1 00:00:02,043 --> 00:00:05,005 rock music 2 00:00:16,933 --> 00:00:18,852 All right. Is it recording? 3 00:00:18,893 --> 00:00:20,353 Yeah. 4 00:00:20,395 --> 00:00:21,646 Um, hi. 5 00:00:21,688 --> 00:00:23,732 I, uh, I'm Carl Gallagher. 6 00:00:23,773 --> 00:00:25,358 You had to think about that? 7 00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:27,485 No, it's just weird. 8 00:00:27,527 --> 00:00:29,863 Hi. I'm Deborah Margaret Gallagher. 9 00:00:29,904 --> 00:00:31,531 -Deborah Margaret? -It's my real name. 10 00:00:31,573 --> 00:00:32,866 It is? 11 00:00:32,907 --> 00:00:34,534 Glad you know me so well. 12 00:00:34,576 --> 00:00:35,660 No one gives a fuck about you. 13 00:00:35,702 --> 00:00:36,494 They wanna hear about Fiona. 14 00:00:37,579 --> 00:00:39,330 Yes, Team Fiona! 15 00:00:40,582 --> 00:00:42,083 Take a ride 16 00:00:42,125 --> 00:00:44,502 Take a ride on the wild side 17 00:00:44,544 --> 00:00:45,879 All right. 18 00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:47,380 I'm a fun person. 19 00:00:47,422 --> 00:00:48,590 -Shit! 20 00:00:48,631 --> 00:00:49,758 Hey! 21 00:00:49,799 --> 00:00:51,885 I like to have fun. 22 00:00:51,926 --> 00:00:53,928 Ah! Ahh! 23 00:00:53,970 --> 00:00:54,971 Yee-hee-hee! 24 00:00:55,013 --> 00:00:56,806 What? What? 25 00:00:56,848 --> 00:01:00,060 Take a joyride 26 00:01:00,101 --> 00:01:03,897 Let's go on a journey to the bright side 27 00:01:03,938 --> 00:01:05,565 Don't know where we're heading 28 00:01:05,607 --> 00:01:07,650 But it's all right 29 00:01:07,692 --> 00:01:11,237 Better than all right 30 00:01:11,279 --> 00:01:13,698 -Really? -They're free. 31 00:01:13,740 --> 00:01:15,408 Joyride 32 00:01:15,450 --> 00:01:17,410 -Whoo! 33 00:01:19,287 --> 00:01:20,580 Whoo! 34 00:01:20,622 --> 00:01:23,374 A dream inside of my mind 35 00:01:23,416 --> 00:01:26,252 Better hold on tight 36 00:01:30,465 --> 00:01:31,549 Ah! 37 00:01:31,591 --> 00:01:33,968 -Oh, my gosh! 38 00:01:40,141 --> 00:01:41,893 Why are we doing this anyway? 39 00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:43,144 Is it, like, for a job or some shit? 40 00:01:43,186 --> 00:01:45,105 She's trying out for some dating reality show. 41 00:01:45,146 --> 00:01:47,398 -That why you all dressed up? -No. 42 00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:49,109 "I'm Deborah Margaret, and I like to dress to sit around--" 43 00:01:49,150 --> 00:01:50,652 Shut the fuck up. 44 00:01:50,693 --> 00:01:52,445 We're supposed to be talking about Fiona's character. 45 00:01:52,487 --> 00:01:54,030 She has no character. 46 00:01:54,072 --> 00:01:54,989 You owe me a beer! 47 00:01:56,825 --> 00:01:58,576 rock music 48 00:01:58,618 --> 00:02:00,453 Fiona Gallagher, you have the right to remain silent. 49 00:02:00,495 --> 00:02:01,788 Anything you say 50 00:02:01,830 --> 00:02:02,747 can and will be used against you 51 00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:04,457 in a court of law. 52 00:02:04,499 --> 00:02:05,792 A little early for a drink, isn't it? 53 00:02:05,834 --> 00:02:07,460 All right, Mom. I'm gonna turn in. 54 00:02:07,502 --> 00:02:08,586 Lost my job today. 55 00:02:08,628 --> 00:02:09,420 Fuckin' the boss? 56 00:02:09,462 --> 00:02:10,922 Nah. Nephew. 57 00:02:13,591 --> 00:02:15,301 That's for fucking my husband! 58 00:02:15,343 --> 00:02:16,803 Slut! 59 00:02:16,845 --> 00:02:18,555 Tell me all about it 60 00:02:18,596 --> 00:02:20,223 Did you know he was married? 61 00:02:20,265 --> 00:02:21,641 Well, it's a good thing that I met up with Craig Heisner. 62 00:02:21,683 --> 00:02:22,725 He's married. 63 00:02:22,767 --> 00:02:23,768 What about your wife? 64 00:02:23,810 --> 00:02:25,562 Babe, I'm all about it 65 00:02:25,603 --> 00:02:27,105 At least it's chocolate. 66 00:02:27,147 --> 00:02:29,524 Liam, we gotta get you onto this potty. 67 00:02:29,566 --> 00:02:31,860 We could take some of the money that we spend on diapers 68 00:02:31,901 --> 00:02:33,111 and buy you candy. 69 00:02:33,153 --> 00:02:34,362 Ah, rewards for shitting. 70 00:02:34,404 --> 00:02:35,697 The good old days. 71 00:02:35,738 --> 00:02:37,532 Whoa, Debs, whose blood is that? 72 00:02:37,574 --> 00:02:38,658 Hard to say. 73 00:02:38,700 --> 00:02:39,826 Could be Holly's. Could be Ellie's. 74 00:02:39,868 --> 00:02:41,661 As your legal guardian, I'm obligated 75 00:02:41,703 --> 00:02:44,539 to say violence is wrong, but those bitches deserved it. 76 00:02:46,082 --> 00:02:48,042 Maybe I'm tired of playing Susie fucking Sunshine 77 00:02:48,084 --> 00:02:49,502 all the time, huh? 78 00:02:49,544 --> 00:02:50,712 Fuck you, Mom. 79 00:02:50,753 --> 00:02:52,130 You smell like a bar room floor. 80 00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:53,506 It's mouthwash. I just gargled. 81 00:02:53,548 --> 00:02:55,508 -I have something to tell you. -Knock first! 82 00:02:55,550 --> 00:02:56,801 Let's go to the clinic right now. 83 00:02:56,843 --> 00:02:58,094 Oh, my God. 84 00:02:58,136 --> 00:02:59,429 How many times do I have to tell you 85 00:02:59,470 --> 00:03:00,513 I am not killing my baby? 86 00:03:00,555 --> 00:03:02,140 I hate your hair. 87 00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:03,266 A gun? 88 00:03:03,308 --> 00:03:04,350 DFS took the kids this morning. 89 00:03:04,392 --> 00:03:05,602 School starts today? 90 00:03:05,643 --> 00:03:06,686 I'm in charge of this family. 91 00:03:06,728 --> 00:03:07,687 One, two, three 92 00:03:07,729 --> 00:03:09,314 Neither one of us has a job. 93 00:03:09,355 --> 00:03:10,815 One week with me as their guardian, 94 00:03:10,857 --> 00:03:12,358 they're about to be homeless. 95 00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:13,693 What was the final tally of the purse? 96 00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:15,653 526 bucks. 97 00:03:15,695 --> 00:03:16,988 I heart Sizzler. 98 00:03:18,406 --> 00:03:19,949 Damn it. Carl! 99 00:03:19,991 --> 00:03:21,492 Did Carl blow up the neighborhood again? 100 00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:22,994 No, I forgot to pay the bill. 101 00:03:23,036 --> 00:03:24,162 Ugh. 102 00:03:24,204 --> 00:03:25,330 The hell? 103 00:03:25,371 --> 00:03:27,165 I don't even give a what 104 00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:28,208 Fuck. 105 00:03:28,249 --> 00:03:30,293 Oh, FYI, water got shut off. 106 00:03:30,335 --> 00:03:31,669 You should probably pay the bill. 107 00:03:36,424 --> 00:03:39,219 Guess who just got fuckin' fired! 108 00:03:39,260 --> 00:03:40,511 Gonna hang around here drinking all day? 109 00:03:40,553 --> 00:03:41,721 I might eat something, too. 110 00:03:43,056 --> 00:03:44,724 I'll have money for you later today. 111 00:03:44,766 --> 00:03:46,351 Any chance you could get it to me now? 112 00:03:46,392 --> 00:03:48,394 Bailing you out of jail last week kind of cleaned me out. 113 00:03:48,436 --> 00:03:49,729 One, two, three 114 00:03:49,771 --> 00:03:51,064 Read the charges. 115 00:03:51,105 --> 00:03:52,232 Possession of a controlled substance 116 00:03:52,273 --> 00:03:53,233 and child endangerment. 117 00:03:53,274 --> 00:03:54,192 How does the defendant plead? 118 00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:55,193 Guilty, Your Honor. 119 00:03:55,235 --> 00:03:56,736 Get back 120 00:03:56,778 --> 00:03:59,030 I got all the therapy you could ever need right here. 121 00:04:00,406 --> 00:04:01,574 Guess we're not having turkey tomorrow. 122 00:04:01,616 --> 00:04:02,825 Too expensive. 123 00:04:02,867 --> 00:04:05,078 Gotta use pawn shop money for the bills. 124 00:04:05,119 --> 00:04:06,412 Can you hit me with a milk refill? 125 00:04:06,454 --> 00:04:07,747 She wasn't shoplifting. 126 00:04:07,789 --> 00:04:09,249 She forgot to pay. 127 00:04:09,290 --> 00:04:11,084 It's a symptom of her low IQ. 128 00:04:11,125 --> 00:04:12,085 She's retarded? 129 00:04:12,126 --> 00:04:13,503 That's a deeply offensive word. 130 00:04:13,544 --> 00:04:15,004 That's right, Debs. You tell her. 131 00:04:18,299 --> 00:04:19,926 Who the hell are you? 132 00:04:19,968 --> 00:04:22,095 I'm Brittany Sturgess from Child Protective Services. 133 00:04:24,597 --> 00:04:26,099 Truth is, 134 00:04:26,140 --> 00:04:27,934 I don't know what a good mother's supposed to be like. 135 00:04:27,976 --> 00:04:29,769 Fiona was always telling us she was a good mother, 136 00:04:29,811 --> 00:04:31,938 like, a lot, all the time. 137 00:04:31,980 --> 00:04:33,189 So does that make it true? 138 00:04:33,231 --> 00:04:34,774 Does that make her a good mother? 139 00:04:34,816 --> 00:04:36,109 Like, when someone tells you something 140 00:04:36,150 --> 00:04:37,610 that they always want you to believe in. 141 00:04:37,652 --> 00:04:39,612 Like, do I believe that she was a good mother, for real? 142 00:04:39,654 --> 00:04:41,656 Or do I just believe that she was a good mother 143 00:04:41,698 --> 00:04:43,283 because she was always telling us she was a good mother? 144 00:04:43,324 --> 00:04:45,326 Fuck. 145 00:04:45,368 --> 00:04:46,786 I don't know. 146 00:04:46,828 --> 00:04:48,955 My head hurts. 147 00:04:48,997 --> 00:04:50,331 lively music 148 00:04:50,373 --> 00:04:51,457 I'm raising five kids. 149 00:04:51,499 --> 00:04:52,625 What's your excuse? 150 00:04:52,667 --> 00:04:53,835 Shut the fuck up! 151 00:04:53,876 --> 00:04:56,546 I am the one who saw to your survival 152 00:04:56,587 --> 00:04:58,589 since you were babies. 153 00:04:58,631 --> 00:05:00,258 Do you ever check for carbon monoxide leaks? 154 00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:02,051 No. Too busy. 155 00:05:02,093 --> 00:05:04,220 You know, raising five kids and Frank. 156 00:05:04,262 --> 00:05:05,638 I have five kids. 157 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:07,056 They're my siblings, but I raise them. 158 00:05:07,098 --> 00:05:08,474 I'm raising a sociopath. 159 00:05:08,516 --> 00:05:09,726 You're graduating. 160 00:05:09,767 --> 00:05:11,102 I didn't, and I still regret it. 161 00:05:11,144 --> 00:05:13,896 -Who's stopping you? -Debbie, Carl, Liam, you. 162 00:05:13,938 --> 00:05:15,231 I'm not taking care of another kid. 163 00:05:15,273 --> 00:05:17,400 I raised five fucking kids. 164 00:05:17,442 --> 00:05:19,819 There's no way you're going to be able to raise a baby, 165 00:05:19,861 --> 00:05:21,821 and I am going to get stuck doing it! 166 00:05:21,863 --> 00:05:23,656 You feel like the world would stop spinning on its axis 167 00:05:23,698 --> 00:05:25,616 if you take a night off. 168 00:05:25,658 --> 00:05:26,826 You know when a plane starts going down 169 00:05:26,868 --> 00:05:27,910 and they tell you to put your mask on 170 00:05:27,952 --> 00:05:29,120 before helping anyone else? 171 00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:30,621 Put your mask on, Fiona! 172 00:05:30,663 --> 00:05:31,914 Yeah? 173 00:05:31,956 --> 00:05:33,916 Well, I've never been on a plane! 174 00:05:33,958 --> 00:05:35,960 soft music 175 00:05:36,002 --> 00:05:38,671 You know, being guardian doesn't make you super-mom. 176 00:05:38,713 --> 00:05:40,089 You noticed. 177 00:05:40,131 --> 00:05:42,175 Could I possibly be doing a worse job 178 00:05:42,216 --> 00:05:43,343 of raising these kids? 179 00:05:43,384 --> 00:05:45,636 Liam isn't smoking crack. 180 00:05:45,678 --> 00:05:48,514 I'm just saying, uh, it's not all on you. 181 00:05:48,556 --> 00:05:50,683 I hope I'm not fucking up the kids. 182 00:05:50,725 --> 00:05:52,226 Thanks. 183 00:05:52,268 --> 00:05:53,728 You don't 184 00:05:53,770 --> 00:05:54,729 She left! 185 00:05:54,771 --> 00:05:56,439 I was nine! 186 00:05:56,481 --> 00:05:58,232 Taking care of all of us. 187 00:05:58,274 --> 00:06:00,401 My job is to keep this house going. 188 00:06:00,443 --> 00:06:02,445 We're locking up the house. 189 00:06:02,487 --> 00:06:04,238 Busting my ass, making meals, 190 00:06:04,280 --> 00:06:05,698 keeping everything straight. 191 00:06:05,740 --> 00:06:06,949 Can you give me a minute first? 192 00:06:06,991 --> 00:06:07,825 Sure. 193 00:06:09,619 --> 00:06:11,245 This is about what I did, and you know what? 194 00:06:11,287 --> 00:06:13,081 I did a fuckin' great job. 195 00:06:13,122 --> 00:06:14,457 No one 196 00:06:14,499 --> 00:06:15,666 Debbie is on the debate team. 197 00:06:15,708 --> 00:06:16,709 Going to nationals. 198 00:06:16,751 --> 00:06:18,669 Lip, top of his class. 199 00:06:18,711 --> 00:06:19,879 He set the curve. 200 00:06:19,921 --> 00:06:22,173 Ian was promoted in ROTC, 201 00:06:22,215 --> 00:06:24,050 and he tested out of English, 202 00:06:24,092 --> 00:06:27,220 and Carl made something blow up for his science fair, 203 00:06:27,261 --> 00:06:28,513 and you know what? 204 00:06:28,554 --> 00:06:30,973 They did it all, no thanks to you, 205 00:06:31,015 --> 00:06:32,725 because you weren't here. 206 00:06:34,185 --> 00:06:35,812 Are you prepared to assume custody? 207 00:06:35,853 --> 00:06:37,146 I am. 208 00:06:37,188 --> 00:06:38,398 If you decide to do this, 209 00:06:38,439 --> 00:06:39,857 there's no changing your mind. 210 00:06:39,899 --> 00:06:42,068 We're talking about the rest of your life. 211 00:06:42,110 --> 00:06:45,196 Do you agree to be the guardian of these children? 212 00:06:48,741 --> 00:06:49,909 Yes, I do. 213 00:06:49,951 --> 00:06:51,661 They'd still be my kids, 214 00:06:51,702 --> 00:06:54,247 but she'd have all the responsibility? 215 00:06:54,288 --> 00:06:55,915 Works for me. 216 00:06:57,083 --> 00:06:58,835 Take your children home. 217 00:07:06,467 --> 00:07:11,305 It's the same thing 218 00:07:11,347 --> 00:07:15,393 Right or wrong 219 00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:17,603 Let's see here. 220 00:07:17,645 --> 00:07:18,479 Here we go. 221 00:07:18,521 --> 00:07:19,730 Hi. How are you? 222 00:07:19,772 --> 00:07:23,151 Um, so you want to know 223 00:07:23,192 --> 00:07:25,069 about Fiona. 224 00:07:26,112 --> 00:07:28,281 Now, remind me, which one is Fiona again? 225 00:07:29,490 --> 00:07:30,408 I'm joking. 226 00:07:30,450 --> 00:07:31,951 She is my sister. 227 00:07:31,993 --> 00:07:32,910 She's four years older. 228 00:07:32,952 --> 00:07:33,870 Good soul. 229 00:07:33,911 --> 00:07:36,122 She, uh, ran this household. 230 00:07:36,164 --> 00:07:38,624 She was the, uh, the glue, 231 00:07:38,666 --> 00:07:41,127 held this family together. 232 00:07:41,169 --> 00:07:42,795 We couldn't have survived without her. 233 00:07:45,006 --> 00:07:46,466 relaxed music 234 00:07:46,507 --> 00:07:48,217 You think you guys can survive one night without Fiona? 235 00:07:48,259 --> 00:07:49,510 No! 236 00:07:51,596 --> 00:07:52,805 Kidding. 237 00:07:52,847 --> 00:07:54,974 -Sure. -Yeah, have a great time. 238 00:07:55,016 --> 00:07:56,809 The rush is starting! 239 00:07:56,851 --> 00:07:58,644 I can't do breakfast and set up for daycare 240 00:07:58,686 --> 00:08:00,021 all at the same time. 241 00:08:00,062 --> 00:08:01,856 Carl, I took down half of the pool. 242 00:08:01,898 --> 00:08:03,107 You have to do the rest. 243 00:08:03,149 --> 00:08:04,692 Look, you gotta get a job this summer 244 00:08:04,734 --> 00:08:06,152 so we can make it through the winter, all right? 245 00:08:06,194 --> 00:08:08,571 Molly, wipe down the extra saucers and teething toys, 246 00:08:08,613 --> 00:08:10,865 and check the nap pads for head lice and boogers. 247 00:08:10,907 --> 00:08:12,825 Come on, Liam, we gotta get you to your fancy school. 248 00:08:12,867 --> 00:08:14,160 Fiona says I can take him. 249 00:08:14,202 --> 00:08:15,703 Fiona's not in charge anymore. 250 00:08:15,745 --> 00:08:18,289 We have dollar a cookie, buck fifty a brownie, 251 00:08:18,331 --> 00:08:19,457 70 for the gun. 252 00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:20,625 upbeat music 253 00:08:20,666 --> 00:08:21,709 Oh. 254 00:08:21,751 --> 00:08:23,085 Can you do this? 255 00:08:23,127 --> 00:08:24,170 Make sure he drinks the whole thing. 256 00:08:24,212 --> 00:08:25,755 He needs his electrolytes. 257 00:08:25,796 --> 00:08:27,381 I've been helping Debbie with daycare. 258 00:08:27,423 --> 00:08:28,674 Who wants a bonus story? 259 00:08:28,716 --> 00:08:30,426 Me! 260 00:08:30,468 --> 00:08:31,844 This is called 261 00:08:31,886 --> 00:08:35,765 "Fiona's Thoughts, Sophomore Year, 2006." 262 00:08:35,806 --> 00:08:37,975 "Flirted with Craig Heisner today. 263 00:08:38,017 --> 00:08:40,353 "His ass looked great in his jeans. 264 00:08:40,394 --> 00:08:42,688 I bet he could really pick me up and throw me around." 265 00:08:44,232 --> 00:08:45,983 Yo, Carl, we taking all them to school, too? 266 00:08:46,025 --> 00:08:48,110 No, back to the parking lot where they live. 267 00:08:48,152 --> 00:08:50,488 -We're not all gonna fit. -Sure we will. 268 00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:52,365 Check, check, check this out 269 00:08:54,325 --> 00:08:57,203 Frosted Flakes, Bisquick, and--ooh, ooh! 270 00:08:57,245 --> 00:08:58,955 Even got a couple of two-for-ones for Tide. 271 00:08:58,996 --> 00:09:00,206 Brought some popcorn shrimp back 272 00:09:00,248 --> 00:09:01,666 from my shitty-ass job. 273 00:09:01,707 --> 00:09:02,750 What's all that shit? 274 00:09:02,792 --> 00:09:04,961 My welding gear. 275 00:09:05,002 --> 00:09:06,295 The hell is it for? 276 00:09:06,337 --> 00:09:07,797 The future. 277 00:09:07,838 --> 00:09:09,215 But, come payday, 278 00:09:09,257 --> 00:09:10,258 you'll see who the real captain is. 279 00:09:10,299 --> 00:09:11,842 Got it. 280 00:09:11,884 --> 00:09:13,386 That's disgusting. 281 00:09:13,427 --> 00:09:15,137 I should add "plumber" to my welding résumé. 282 00:09:17,390 --> 00:09:18,641 -That's your kid? -Yep. 283 00:09:18,683 --> 00:09:19,809 Not afraid to knock a bitch up. 284 00:09:19,850 --> 00:09:21,185 You game? 285 00:09:21,227 --> 00:09:24,105 We got these from Imelda over at the Holiday Inn. 286 00:09:24,146 --> 00:09:25,898 It'll be a good way to stay warm. 287 00:09:25,940 --> 00:09:28,067 3 1/2 Gs? I got you covered. 288 00:09:28,109 --> 00:09:29,527 You want hunnies or small bills? 289 00:09:29,569 --> 00:09:31,487 You're watching Liam today, remember? 290 00:09:31,529 --> 00:09:33,239 I haven't abused marijuana like the rest of you, 291 00:09:33,281 --> 00:09:34,574 so, yes, I remember. 292 00:09:34,615 --> 00:09:36,200 Uh, working furnace, Debs? 293 00:09:36,242 --> 00:09:37,034 On it! 294 00:09:41,247 --> 00:09:43,207 Buy back the house. 295 00:09:44,375 --> 00:09:45,501 No, look, look, look. 296 00:09:45,543 --> 00:09:46,586 Don't-- don't get me wrong, okay? 297 00:09:46,627 --> 00:09:49,088 Fiona tried her absolute best, okay? 298 00:09:49,130 --> 00:09:51,882 But if we were keeping score, which, of course, we're not, 299 00:09:51,924 --> 00:09:53,593 right, I think there may have been somebody else 300 00:09:53,634 --> 00:09:55,928 who held the family together just a little bit better, 301 00:09:55,970 --> 00:09:58,222 and I think that someone... 302 00:09:58,264 --> 00:10:00,308 might be standing in this kitchen right now. 303 00:10:11,986 --> 00:10:13,654 Huh. 304 00:10:13,696 --> 00:10:15,948 I guess it must be me. 305 00:10:15,990 --> 00:10:19,160 Adding the last 50 bucks to the property tax, yo. 306 00:10:19,201 --> 00:10:20,620 I don't have it. 307 00:10:20,661 --> 00:10:21,787 How long we doing this for? 308 00:10:21,829 --> 00:10:23,456 Figure we park 30 more cars, 309 00:10:23,497 --> 00:10:25,958 make enough money to cover the property tax, 310 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:27,126 at which time, people will probably start to realize 311 00:10:27,168 --> 00:10:28,836 Wilco's not playing at Fiona's club. 312 00:10:28,878 --> 00:10:30,171 Then we bolt. 313 00:10:30,212 --> 00:10:31,797 Hey, there, fella. 314 00:10:31,839 --> 00:10:34,967 Ooh, let's go take the Browns to the Super Bowl, huh? 315 00:10:35,009 --> 00:10:36,594 No coffee. Milk or juice. 316 00:10:36,636 --> 00:10:39,597 Okay, we got your favorite, banana pancakes. 317 00:10:39,639 --> 00:10:41,265 -Oh, love banana pancakes. -There you go. 318 00:10:41,307 --> 00:10:42,642 Oh, make yourself at home. 319 00:10:42,683 --> 00:10:44,435 Thousand bucks in the squirrel fund 320 00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:45,561 before you go back to school. 321 00:10:45,603 --> 00:10:46,646 I've got this. 322 00:10:46,687 --> 00:10:48,022 Hey, Carl, go upstairs. 323 00:10:48,064 --> 00:10:49,482 Get your toothbrush and something to sleep in. 324 00:10:49,523 --> 00:10:50,900 Look, I'll take Liam to school today. 325 00:10:50,941 --> 00:10:52,318 I'll grab us some dinner while I'm there. 326 00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:53,319 No worries. No worries. 327 00:10:53,361 --> 00:10:54,487 I'll stay up all night studying. 328 00:10:54,528 --> 00:10:55,696 I mean, what the fuck? 329 00:10:55,738 --> 00:10:57,990 It's just an applied physics quiz. 330 00:11:04,705 --> 00:11:05,748 Outstanding bills. 331 00:11:05,790 --> 00:11:07,124 Electric and rent are late, too? 332 00:11:07,166 --> 00:11:08,668 -We out of diapers? -Yeah. 333 00:11:08,709 --> 00:11:10,670 But I put a plug up his butt, didn't I, buddy? 334 00:11:10,711 --> 00:11:11,962 What's that smell? 335 00:11:12,004 --> 00:11:13,339 Frank, stop smoking weed! 336 00:11:13,381 --> 00:11:14,507 We're gonna get out of here, okay? 337 00:11:14,548 --> 00:11:15,591 We'll be back for dinner tonight. 338 00:11:15,633 --> 00:11:18,010 -No. Lip. -Fiona, just get some sleep. 339 00:11:18,052 --> 00:11:19,345 Sort your shit out. 340 00:11:19,387 --> 00:11:21,347 I didn't ask to play mom, all right? 341 00:11:21,389 --> 00:11:22,515 Neither did she. 342 00:11:22,556 --> 00:11:24,016 So, what, you want me to bust my ass 343 00:11:24,058 --> 00:11:26,185 so I can buy you all houses and shit? 344 00:11:26,227 --> 00:11:27,687 What did you think was gonna happen, Fiona? 345 00:11:27,728 --> 00:11:29,021 Liam almost died! 346 00:11:29,063 --> 00:11:30,189 How 'bout that, huh? 347 00:11:30,231 --> 00:11:31,524 Fuckin' Lip, man. 348 00:11:31,565 --> 00:11:33,317 He's a righteous fuckin' prick. 349 00:11:33,359 --> 00:11:35,361 No, I expected you to not be drunk in the middle of the day! 350 00:11:35,403 --> 00:11:36,570 All fucking you! 351 00:11:36,612 --> 00:11:37,863 Your coke, your boyfriend, 352 00:11:37,905 --> 00:11:39,699 your fucked-up life! 353 00:11:39,740 --> 00:11:40,741 Not mine! 354 00:11:40,783 --> 00:11:42,535 He's on fire 355 00:11:42,576 --> 00:11:46,038 Now, I'm not saying that I was perfect, 356 00:11:46,080 --> 00:11:47,540 and, I mean, I definitely had my own issues. 357 00:11:47,581 --> 00:11:49,583 I am, after all, my father's son. 358 00:11:49,625 --> 00:11:51,794 I used to partake in a glass or two 359 00:11:51,836 --> 00:11:53,379 of alcoholic refreshments, 360 00:11:53,421 --> 00:11:55,256 and Fiona is her father's daughter, 361 00:11:55,297 --> 00:11:59,135 so she, too, liked the, um, glug-glug. 362 00:11:59,176 --> 00:12:01,554 You know, I often wondered, if there was a contest, 363 00:12:01,595 --> 00:12:02,805 who could drink who under the table. 364 00:12:04,348 --> 00:12:06,559 Hi. My name is Fiona. 365 00:12:06,600 --> 00:12:08,477 I'm not sure if I'm an alcoholic. 366 00:12:11,230 --> 00:12:14,191 upbeat music 367 00:12:30,291 --> 00:12:31,709 Hey, I need a drink. 368 00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:32,960 Hey. Can I get another? 369 00:12:33,002 --> 00:12:34,086 What you having? 370 00:12:34,128 --> 00:12:35,379 Vodka. 371 00:12:35,421 --> 00:12:37,590 -What are you drinking? -Uh, beer. 372 00:12:41,761 --> 00:12:43,387 -Have you been drinking? -Have you? 373 00:12:45,639 --> 00:12:46,891 You're drunk. 374 00:12:46,932 --> 00:12:49,727 I'm gonna puke. 375 00:12:49,769 --> 00:12:50,936 Did she say she's gonna puke? 376 00:12:50,978 --> 00:12:51,937 Hey, that doesn't open. 377 00:12:51,979 --> 00:12:52,897 Do not puke in the van. 378 00:12:52,938 --> 00:12:54,064 Oh, God. 379 00:12:54,106 --> 00:12:57,401 -Oh, damn. 380 00:13:06,285 --> 00:13:09,288 Oh, Jesus! Fuck! 381 00:13:09,330 --> 00:13:10,790 Gallagher rain. 382 00:13:13,292 --> 00:13:14,293 Ugh. 383 00:13:20,758 --> 00:13:22,301 Cheers. 384 00:13:22,343 --> 00:13:23,761 What the hell are you doing? 385 00:13:23,803 --> 00:13:26,806 Trying to get this fucking beef... 386 00:13:26,847 --> 00:13:28,599 in the oven. 387 00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:30,810 You gotta get in there, beef! 388 00:13:36,857 --> 00:13:38,359 -Hair of the dog? 389 00:13:38,400 --> 00:13:41,320 bluesy music 390 00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:50,496 My pulse beat out a warning 391 00:13:53,707 --> 00:13:55,125 Her stare cuts me like a freeze 392 00:13:56,752 --> 00:13:58,045 Yeah, I'm in deep 393 00:13:58,087 --> 00:13:59,797 Christ. 394 00:14:01,131 --> 00:14:03,217 Yeah, baby, I'm in deep 395 00:14:07,221 --> 00:14:11,517 And if you won't just let it be 396 00:14:11,559 --> 00:14:13,185 You gotta believe 397 00:14:17,731 --> 00:14:19,024 Hungry? 398 00:14:19,692 --> 00:14:20,693 Don't. 399 00:14:20,734 --> 00:14:21,777 Chicken pot pie? 400 00:14:21,819 --> 00:14:22,987 -I'm serious. -Sloppy joes? 401 00:14:23,028 --> 00:14:24,029 Stop. Fiona. 402 00:14:25,573 --> 00:14:28,200 I don't know, now that I'm thinking of it... 403 00:14:28,242 --> 00:14:30,494 you know, perhaps our behavior while intoxicated 404 00:14:30,536 --> 00:14:32,621 was, uh, less than exemplary. 405 00:14:32,663 --> 00:14:35,875 Uh, Fiona and I, 406 00:14:35,916 --> 00:14:38,919 we're probably a lot more alike than I'm willing to admit. 407 00:14:38,961 --> 00:14:40,838 I'll put it this way. 408 00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:44,383 If Fiona and I were in a band together, 409 00:14:44,425 --> 00:14:49,346 we'd be called The Chaos Junkies. 410 00:14:49,388 --> 00:14:52,266 bluesy music 411 00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:03,444 Whoa! 412 00:15:03,485 --> 00:15:05,321 Hey, that bitch stole my oxy! 413 00:15:05,362 --> 00:15:07,698 Fucking skank bitch! Get her! 414 00:15:10,534 --> 00:15:12,745 Catch me, I'm falling 415 00:15:12,786 --> 00:15:15,414 South Side piece of shit! 416 00:15:15,456 --> 00:15:18,167 - Catch me, I'm falling 417 00:15:18,208 --> 00:15:19,418 On hard times again 418 00:15:19,460 --> 00:15:21,921 Hard times, hard times 419 00:15:21,962 --> 00:15:24,924 It's sending me around the bend 420 00:15:24,965 --> 00:15:27,092 Hard times 421 00:15:27,134 --> 00:15:28,761 Oh, fuck. 422 00:15:28,802 --> 00:15:30,596 You have a bedroom, Lip. 423 00:15:30,638 --> 00:15:33,098 Yeah, says the girl who had sex on the stairs last night. 424 00:15:33,140 --> 00:15:34,934 -Hallway. -Stand corrected. 425 00:15:34,975 --> 00:15:37,937 rock music 426 00:15:46,987 --> 00:15:48,238 Bitch! 427 00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:50,616 Chaos, Fiona. Chaos follows you around. 428 00:15:50,658 --> 00:15:51,951 Fuck you! 429 00:15:51,992 --> 00:15:54,119 Least I don't have a tiny penis! 430 00:15:56,497 --> 00:15:59,416 Oh, shit. Back up, back up, back up! 431 00:15:59,458 --> 00:16:01,752 Oh, my God! 432 00:16:01,794 --> 00:16:03,921 What are you doing? 433 00:16:05,464 --> 00:16:07,716 You don't care about me anymore 434 00:16:10,219 --> 00:16:11,679 Kick him back. You're punching like a fag. 435 00:16:11,720 --> 00:16:12,721 Come on. 436 00:16:14,098 --> 00:16:15,599 Yo, wakey, wakey. 437 00:16:15,641 --> 00:16:17,643 -Get the fuck away from me! -Whoa, whoa, whoa! Easy! 438 00:16:17,685 --> 00:16:19,103 This dressing contains mayonnaise, 439 00:16:19,144 --> 00:16:20,312 and I'm allergic to eggs. 440 00:16:20,354 --> 00:16:22,314 I'm allergic to people with allergies. 441 00:16:22,356 --> 00:16:23,774 I'm never coming back. 442 00:16:23,816 --> 00:16:25,609 Okay, 'cause what I could really use 443 00:16:25,651 --> 00:16:27,277 are some more customers who are allergic to food. 444 00:16:27,319 --> 00:16:28,153 Bye. 445 00:16:29,655 --> 00:16:32,616 There are good drunks and bad drunks. 446 00:16:32,658 --> 00:16:33,784 A good drunk is fun. 447 00:16:35,035 --> 00:16:37,246 A bad drunk wants to have a fight. 448 00:16:37,287 --> 00:16:38,664 Fuck your fence. 449 00:16:38,706 --> 00:16:40,290 A good drunk lives in the present. 450 00:16:41,709 --> 00:16:43,419 A bad drunk is thinking about yesterday. 451 00:16:43,460 --> 00:16:44,628 The fuck? 452 00:16:44,670 --> 00:16:46,088 You put my shit on the fucking curb? 453 00:16:46,130 --> 00:16:49,341 It's all about gas and the brakes. 454 00:16:49,383 --> 00:16:50,259 How you feel? 455 00:16:50,300 --> 00:16:51,719 -Great. 456 00:16:51,760 --> 00:16:53,012 -Wanna do another one? -Yeah. 457 00:16:53,053 --> 00:16:54,805 No. 458 00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:57,307 You feel good, right? 459 00:16:57,349 --> 00:16:59,184 So take a break, driver eight. 460 00:16:59,226 --> 00:17:02,146 rock music 461 00:17:05,774 --> 00:17:07,609 Wake up, sleepyhead. 462 00:17:07,651 --> 00:17:09,903 Oh, fuck. 463 00:17:09,945 --> 00:17:11,822 It's the middle of the day, man. 464 00:17:13,365 --> 00:17:15,075 Wait, you want another sex video? 465 00:17:15,117 --> 00:17:16,994 No, doofus. Remember? 466 00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:19,747 We're supposed to record a few words about Fiona. 467 00:17:19,788 --> 00:17:21,749 Oh, your bitch of a sister? 468 00:17:21,790 --> 00:17:23,167 Whoa. Why you saying that? 469 00:17:23,208 --> 00:17:24,543 'Cause all she ever did was boss you guys around. 470 00:17:26,670 --> 00:17:28,547 First of the month. Pony up. 471 00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:30,174 Hey, dishes to the sink. 472 00:17:30,215 --> 00:17:31,008 When you find something that isn't yours, 473 00:17:31,050 --> 00:17:32,009 keep it that way. 474 00:17:32,051 --> 00:17:33,218 Let's go. 475 00:17:33,260 --> 00:17:34,887 Put that stroller back in the garbage. 476 00:17:34,928 --> 00:17:36,555 School supplies and clothing. Nothing else. 477 00:17:36,597 --> 00:17:37,681 Don't get any ideas. 478 00:17:37,723 --> 00:17:40,309 Oh! No peep holes! 479 00:17:40,350 --> 00:17:41,810 Hey, brush your teeth, now. 480 00:17:41,852 --> 00:17:43,145 Debbie, go brush your teeth. 481 00:17:43,187 --> 00:17:45,230 -You both brush your teeth? - Yes! 482 00:17:45,272 --> 00:17:46,398 Someone get the door. 483 00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:47,357 Carl, what the hell? 484 00:17:47,399 --> 00:17:48,567 Where are you, Ian? 485 00:17:48,609 --> 00:17:50,069 This is your sister and your boss. 486 00:17:50,110 --> 00:17:51,653 You're really gonna smoke this right in front of me? 487 00:17:51,695 --> 00:17:53,739 Maybe next time you'll do what I ask. 488 00:17:53,781 --> 00:17:55,074 Find Carl and get home, now. 489 00:17:55,115 --> 00:17:56,742 -I asked you to clean up. -Did ya? 490 00:17:58,410 --> 00:17:59,787 -Okay. -The fuck? 491 00:17:59,828 --> 00:18:01,789 Party is over, now. 492 00:18:01,830 --> 00:18:04,124 -Man, let's go. This some... -Everybody out! 493 00:18:04,166 --> 00:18:05,042 Bye! 494 00:18:05,084 --> 00:18:06,877 Those are my fuckin' Fritos. 495 00:18:08,045 --> 00:18:09,296 Hey, Gallaghers, 496 00:18:09,338 --> 00:18:11,799 I need focus and cooperation. 497 00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:13,300 Debbie, go get everyone so we can get our stories straight. 498 00:18:13,342 --> 00:18:15,010 It's not up for discussion. 499 00:18:15,052 --> 00:18:16,595 You're gonna dress like a fucking law-abiding citizen 500 00:18:16,637 --> 00:18:17,888 whether you like it or not. 501 00:18:17,930 --> 00:18:19,681 In bed by midnight. No exceptions. 502 00:18:19,723 --> 00:18:21,183 You're filthy. Go take a shower. 503 00:18:21,225 --> 00:18:22,726 Both need showers. You're rank. 504 00:18:22,768 --> 00:18:24,686 No more playing dress-up. Hymen stays intact. 505 00:18:24,728 --> 00:18:26,522 No. Absolutely not. 506 00:18:26,563 --> 00:18:28,398 No more peeing off the balcony. 507 00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:30,943 Debbie, that is not the outfit 508 00:18:30,984 --> 00:18:32,444 that we picked out for your first day. 509 00:18:32,486 --> 00:18:34,238 It's not stripper school. Go change. 510 00:18:37,783 --> 00:18:39,118 Carl! 511 00:18:39,159 --> 00:18:41,870 Morning, Mrs. Babiak. 512 00:18:41,912 --> 00:18:43,789 There's a toilet right there. 513 00:18:43,831 --> 00:18:45,624 Mrs. Babiak doesn't need an anatomy lesson. 514 00:18:45,666 --> 00:18:47,709 Please, Mrs. Babiak's got my 18th birthday circled 515 00:18:47,751 --> 00:18:48,961 on her calendar. 516 00:18:49,002 --> 00:18:50,254 Don't forget to take your meds. 517 00:18:50,295 --> 00:18:51,130 Don't forget to take your meds. 518 00:18:51,171 --> 00:18:53,882 -Meds? -Yes, Mom. 519 00:18:53,924 --> 00:18:55,259 Are they giving you your meds in there? 520 00:18:59,513 --> 00:19:01,348 Okay, she was bossy 521 00:19:01,390 --> 00:19:02,850 and bitchy, 522 00:19:02,891 --> 00:19:05,060 but maybe we could say it in a nicer way. 523 00:19:05,102 --> 00:19:06,353 Cunty. 524 00:19:06,395 --> 00:19:08,188 -Much nicer. -Thanks. 525 00:19:09,273 --> 00:19:11,608 No, I think she was just stressed all the time 526 00:19:11,650 --> 00:19:13,110 and overwhelmed. 527 00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:14,653 I mean, can you imagine having to wake up 528 00:19:14,695 --> 00:19:16,071 five jerk-off kids every morning 529 00:19:16,113 --> 00:19:18,949 and trying to get them out the door to school? 530 00:19:18,991 --> 00:19:21,618 Kids, breakfast! 531 00:19:21,660 --> 00:19:23,453 Rise and shine! 532 00:19:23,495 --> 00:19:24,788 Good morning, Milk Dud! 533 00:19:24,830 --> 00:19:26,290 School. Hey. Up. 534 00:19:26,331 --> 00:19:27,249 Up. 535 00:19:27,291 --> 00:19:28,458 Up and at 'em! 536 00:19:28,500 --> 00:19:30,127 Let's go, Frank. Showtime. 537 00:19:31,253 --> 00:19:32,421 Jesus. 538 00:19:32,462 --> 00:19:34,423 Ten minutes to get downstairs! 539 00:19:34,464 --> 00:19:36,550 Get up and get to school. 540 00:19:36,592 --> 00:19:37,843 You're gonna be late for school. 541 00:19:37,885 --> 00:19:38,969 Why aren't you getting ready for school? 542 00:19:39,011 --> 00:19:39,970 School. 543 00:19:40,012 --> 00:19:41,096 School, remember? 544 00:19:41,138 --> 00:19:43,182 15 minutes before school, tops. 545 00:19:43,223 --> 00:19:45,684 Debbie, come in and eat your breakfast, okay? 546 00:19:45,726 --> 00:19:46,810 You're up next in the shower. 547 00:19:46,852 --> 00:19:47,686 Eat, now. 548 00:19:49,146 --> 00:19:51,356 Debs, Lip, come and get it! 549 00:19:51,398 --> 00:19:52,941 Eat more than just a Pop-Tart. 550 00:19:52,983 --> 00:19:55,152 No more popsicles for breakfast, okay? 551 00:19:55,194 --> 00:19:56,445 No pizza. Fruit or juice. 552 00:19:56,486 --> 00:19:58,030 No pie. Get in the shower. 553 00:19:58,071 --> 00:19:59,364 I'm not saying it again. 554 00:19:59,406 --> 00:20:01,533 - Lunch? -Shit. 555 00:20:03,493 --> 00:20:04,536 Would you grab the paper bags? 556 00:20:06,872 --> 00:20:07,873 Here. Go. 557 00:20:07,915 --> 00:20:08,874 Don't forget your lunch. 558 00:20:08,916 --> 00:20:10,709 Late start this morning, guys. 559 00:20:10,751 --> 00:20:12,711 -Sorry. You're on your own. -Where's my lunch? 560 00:20:12,753 --> 00:20:15,088 You're each gettin' $3 to buy your very own school lunch. 561 00:20:15,130 --> 00:20:16,840 Gallagher clan is flush. 562 00:20:16,882 --> 00:20:18,342 We're creepin' up on the poverty line. 563 00:20:18,383 --> 00:20:20,093 Hey, bat stays here. 564 00:20:20,135 --> 00:20:21,511 You're gonna be late. Go. 565 00:20:21,553 --> 00:20:22,262 -Bye. -Everyone out. 566 00:20:24,097 --> 00:20:25,390 Shit! 567 00:20:27,601 --> 00:20:30,187 Hey, guys! 568 00:20:36,777 --> 00:20:38,111 What'd she have to be stressed about? 569 00:20:38,153 --> 00:20:39,613 -She was gettin' plenty of D. 570 00:20:39,655 --> 00:20:41,907 Oh, hey, reality show dating people, 571 00:20:41,949 --> 00:20:44,159 get ready to have your dick sucked. 572 00:20:44,201 --> 00:20:46,119 Whoa, what's good? 573 00:20:46,161 --> 00:20:48,163 I heard you up in my neighborhood 574 00:20:48,205 --> 00:20:50,082 Heard you up in my neighborhood 575 00:20:50,123 --> 00:20:52,251 -Ah! - Whoa, what's good? 576 00:20:52,292 --> 00:20:54,127 Daddy, come over 577 00:20:54,169 --> 00:20:57,214 Let me get you stoned, stoned, stoned 578 00:20:57,256 --> 00:20:59,383 I heard you up in my neighborhood 579 00:21:01,593 --> 00:21:05,514 - You nasty 580 00:21:05,555 --> 00:21:08,267 There was always a revolving door of guys in this place. 581 00:21:08,308 --> 00:21:10,435 Yeah, she had more cock in her than a bus station urinal, man. 582 00:21:11,812 --> 00:21:13,605 lively music 583 00:21:13,647 --> 00:21:16,108 -Ooh. 584 00:21:16,149 --> 00:21:17,317 Come on, I saw the way you looked at Steve 585 00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:18,902 like a D-O-G in heat. 586 00:21:18,944 --> 00:21:20,279 Not true. 587 00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:21,488 You never looked at the other 95 guys that way. 588 00:21:21,530 --> 00:21:23,407 Don't exaggerate. 94. 589 00:21:23,448 --> 00:21:25,242 Take a look. Al's Beef. 590 00:21:25,284 --> 00:21:27,160 I think I just came. 591 00:21:27,202 --> 00:21:28,787 I've been dating this guy, Steve. 592 00:21:28,829 --> 00:21:30,122 About all we have is passion. 593 00:21:30,163 --> 00:21:31,456 Mm... 594 00:21:31,498 --> 00:21:32,958 Or two? 595 00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:34,668 Oh, God, one! 596 00:21:34,710 --> 00:21:36,586 -Who the fuck is Candice? -Who? 597 00:21:36,628 --> 00:21:38,588 -Uh, morning. -This is Gus. 598 00:21:38,630 --> 00:21:40,507 Boyfriend and girlfriend or just fuck buddies? 599 00:21:40,549 --> 00:21:41,967 Welcome to my family. 600 00:21:42,009 --> 00:21:44,011 Last night was my first time. Ever. 601 00:21:44,052 --> 00:21:45,304 Tony, are you saying you were a... 602 00:21:45,345 --> 00:21:46,805 Virgin? 603 00:21:46,847 --> 00:21:48,307 Holy shit. You popped his cherry? 604 00:21:48,348 --> 00:21:49,516 It's a big thing. 605 00:21:49,558 --> 00:21:51,143 It's above average. 606 00:21:51,184 --> 00:21:52,144 Yes. 607 00:21:52,185 --> 00:21:53,020 You and Mike getting serious? 608 00:21:54,187 --> 00:21:55,522 -I like him. -Sex good? 609 00:21:56,606 --> 00:21:57,482 I don't know yet. 610 00:21:57,524 --> 00:21:58,984 First date Fiona? 611 00:21:59,026 --> 00:22:00,402 The girl who puts out 612 00:22:00,444 --> 00:22:01,445 waiting in line at the Wendy's drive-thru? 613 00:22:01,486 --> 00:22:03,405 Who told you that? Ronnie Finnegan? 614 00:22:03,447 --> 00:22:05,073 Ben Troutman. Jesus Christ. 615 00:22:05,115 --> 00:22:06,908 You've done that more than once? 616 00:22:06,950 --> 00:22:08,076 Is this a date? 617 00:22:08,118 --> 00:22:09,286 Why? Are you hoping it is a date? 618 00:22:09,328 --> 00:22:11,163 Or you're afraid we got mixed signals? 619 00:22:11,204 --> 00:22:12,331 I like the signals. 620 00:22:12,372 --> 00:22:15,334 dance music 621 00:22:17,002 --> 00:22:18,420 Oh, fuck! 622 00:22:18,462 --> 00:22:19,504 -Nice to meet you. -Mm-hmm. 623 00:22:20,881 --> 00:22:22,174 You're pretty damn intriguing. 624 00:22:22,215 --> 00:22:23,175 How intriguing? 625 00:22:26,219 --> 00:22:27,512 He's your boyfriend's brother! 626 00:22:27,554 --> 00:22:28,680 What are you doing here? 627 00:22:28,722 --> 00:22:29,890 Trying to get it through your thick skull 628 00:22:29,931 --> 00:22:30,891 that this is over. 629 00:22:30,932 --> 00:22:31,725 Could've called. 630 00:22:31,767 --> 00:22:33,143 Or used Facebook. 631 00:22:33,185 --> 00:22:34,227 I'm not on Facebook. 632 00:22:35,771 --> 00:22:37,064 What do you want me to say? 633 00:22:37,105 --> 00:22:39,024 That--that I'm self-destructive? 634 00:22:39,066 --> 00:22:42,235 That liars and thieves and addicts turn me on? 635 00:22:42,277 --> 00:22:44,863 That I don't know how to do a normal relationship? 636 00:22:44,905 --> 00:22:45,989 Was that so hard? 637 00:22:46,031 --> 00:22:47,532 -Uh-oh. -What? 638 00:22:47,574 --> 00:22:49,034 Oh, fuck. Is it lice? 639 00:22:49,076 --> 00:22:52,871 This is a completely new brand of foreplay for me. 640 00:22:52,913 --> 00:22:55,540 You really know how to keep it interesting, Gallagher. 641 00:22:55,582 --> 00:22:56,541 What are you doing? 642 00:22:56,583 --> 00:22:57,834 Ah, just burning my clothes. 643 00:22:57,876 --> 00:22:58,794 Why? 644 00:22:58,835 --> 00:23:00,545 Ah, you don't need to know. 645 00:23:00,587 --> 00:23:02,297 I'm bringing you there. 646 00:23:02,339 --> 00:23:03,507 Oh, this motel? It's classy. 647 00:23:03,548 --> 00:23:04,674 Rooms by the hour. 648 00:23:04,716 --> 00:23:06,009 That's why it's fun. 649 00:23:06,051 --> 00:23:07,719 Usually, by this time in a relationship, 650 00:23:07,761 --> 00:23:10,180 the guy starts just showing up for late-night booty calls 651 00:23:10,222 --> 00:23:11,515 or wants me to meet his mother. 652 00:23:11,556 --> 00:23:13,517 Your lady sure knows her way around a cucumber. 653 00:23:13,558 --> 00:23:14,643 Whoa! 654 00:23:14,684 --> 00:23:15,852 Either way, I start looking 655 00:23:15,894 --> 00:23:16,728 for reasons to walk. 656 00:23:16,770 --> 00:23:18,146 This is why you need Tinder. 657 00:23:18,188 --> 00:23:18,980 Give me your phone. 658 00:23:19,022 --> 00:23:20,690 Just swipe, fuck, leave. 659 00:23:20,732 --> 00:23:23,693 V, where are you? 660 00:23:23,735 --> 00:23:24,820 You're drunk. 661 00:23:24,861 --> 00:23:26,530 I just Tinder fucked. 662 00:23:26,571 --> 00:23:29,074 Six pack, only in town for a week. 663 00:23:29,116 --> 00:23:30,117 What's the tattoo? 664 00:23:30,158 --> 00:23:31,284 Mm. Whoa. 665 00:23:31,326 --> 00:23:33,537 Sex and back to thinking money. 666 00:23:33,578 --> 00:23:34,371 What are you? 667 00:23:34,413 --> 00:23:36,623 My financial consultant? 668 00:23:36,665 --> 00:23:38,917 You mean you're actually a financial consultant? 669 00:23:38,959 --> 00:23:39,918 What's wrong with your neck? 670 00:23:39,960 --> 00:23:41,086 Weird rash. 671 00:23:41,128 --> 00:23:42,587 Hmm. It's mouth-shaped. 672 00:23:42,629 --> 00:23:44,714 -Slut. -I know you are, but what am I? 673 00:23:44,756 --> 00:23:46,258 Oh, I'll spank her later. 674 00:23:46,299 --> 00:23:47,592 Her? What about me? 675 00:23:47,634 --> 00:23:49,094 - Know what's weird? -Hmm? 676 00:23:49,136 --> 00:23:50,929 Sitting at a family diner with an erection. 677 00:23:50,971 --> 00:23:52,431 I'll keep that image in mind 678 00:23:52,472 --> 00:23:54,933 while I'm clearing plates of fried eggs. 679 00:23:55,976 --> 00:23:57,477 Ah! 680 00:23:59,146 --> 00:24:01,356 upbeat music 681 00:24:01,398 --> 00:24:02,899 I love you. 682 00:24:02,941 --> 00:24:04,526 Did I mention that I'm falling in love with you? 683 00:24:04,568 --> 00:24:06,194 I fucking love you, okay? 684 00:24:06,236 --> 00:24:07,779 What I want is Fiona. 685 00:24:07,821 --> 00:24:09,114 I love her. 686 00:24:09,156 --> 00:24:10,615 Love is fleeting, Jimmy. 687 00:24:10,657 --> 00:24:11,867 Do you know what he just told me? 688 00:24:11,908 --> 00:24:13,368 That he's fallin' in love with me. 689 00:24:13,410 --> 00:24:14,453 You didn't say it back, did you? 690 00:24:14,494 --> 00:24:15,454 I'm falling in love with you, too. 691 00:24:15,495 --> 00:24:16,788 -No. -Good girl. 692 00:24:16,830 --> 00:24:18,039 But I'm, like, freakin' out. 693 00:24:18,081 --> 00:24:19,124 I'm, like, tingling. 694 00:24:21,293 --> 00:24:22,127 Hello? 695 00:24:22,169 --> 00:24:23,128 Come with me. 696 00:24:23,170 --> 00:24:25,046 Costa Rica. 697 00:24:25,088 --> 00:24:26,465 Well, I don't have a passport. 698 00:24:26,506 --> 00:24:28,049 We'll get one in Miami. 699 00:24:28,091 --> 00:24:29,593 sweeping music 700 00:24:29,634 --> 00:24:31,303 -Wanna get married? -I'd marry you. 701 00:24:31,344 --> 00:24:32,262 Well, if it were up to me, I'd do it today. 702 00:24:32,304 --> 00:24:33,221 Do it right now. 703 00:24:33,263 --> 00:24:34,306 This is stupid, right? 704 00:24:34,347 --> 00:24:35,765 -Right. -Should we just go? 705 00:24:35,807 --> 00:24:37,142 Gus Pfender and Fiona Gallagher. 706 00:24:40,020 --> 00:24:42,189 How are you today, Mrs. Pfender? 707 00:24:42,230 --> 00:24:44,149 You're the one sleepin' with a married woman. 708 00:24:44,191 --> 00:24:46,443 What's that make you? 709 00:24:46,485 --> 00:24:48,153 Lucky. 710 00:24:48,195 --> 00:24:50,030 If I proposed to you with this big-ass ring, 711 00:24:50,071 --> 00:24:51,281 you'd be so impressed. 712 00:24:51,323 --> 00:24:53,325 Oh, the timing's a little weird. 713 00:24:54,701 --> 00:24:56,661 The ink's barely dry on your divorce. 714 00:24:56,703 --> 00:24:57,746 I didn't think your wedding 715 00:24:57,787 --> 00:24:59,164 was gonna become an annual tradition 716 00:24:59,206 --> 00:25:00,290 like Thanksgiving. 717 00:25:00,332 --> 00:25:01,124 We're good for each other. 718 00:25:01,166 --> 00:25:02,459 Oh! 719 00:25:02,501 --> 00:25:03,627 Oh, you should not have done that. 720 00:25:03,668 --> 00:25:05,086 Oh, yeah? 721 00:25:07,881 --> 00:25:09,341 Where'd you learn about music? You living on Mars? 722 00:25:09,382 --> 00:25:10,467 -Your mom. -Oh, yeah? 723 00:25:10,509 --> 00:25:12,010 -Last time I banged her. -Oh, yeah. 724 00:25:12,052 --> 00:25:14,346 That makes a lot more sense. She has awful taste. 725 00:25:14,387 --> 00:25:15,347 Tell me everywhere 726 00:25:15,388 --> 00:25:17,140 You wanna go 727 00:25:17,182 --> 00:25:20,185 When you can't find the magic 728 00:25:20,227 --> 00:25:21,978 You are awful. 729 00:25:22,020 --> 00:25:23,438 Yee-hee 730 00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:24,523 I love you. 731 00:25:24,564 --> 00:25:25,982 Oh, fuck you. 732 00:25:26,024 --> 00:25:27,692 Do you still love me? 733 00:25:27,734 --> 00:25:29,528 -Don't do it. -No. 734 00:25:29,569 --> 00:25:31,196 Oh, Fiona. 735 00:25:31,238 --> 00:25:34,199 upbeat music 736 00:25:37,410 --> 00:25:39,204 I misread that, didn't I? 737 00:25:40,872 --> 00:25:42,165 Scrub my back? 738 00:25:42,207 --> 00:25:43,375 You want me to scrub your back? 739 00:25:47,295 --> 00:25:49,756 Most of the guys weren't very nice to her, though. 740 00:25:49,798 --> 00:25:52,842 Well, she had a bad picker. It's probably why you're gay. 741 00:25:52,884 --> 00:25:53,718 What? 742 00:25:53,760 --> 00:25:55,220 How so? 743 00:25:55,262 --> 00:25:57,264 Isn't that, like, textbook psychology? 744 00:25:57,305 --> 00:25:59,266 You know, she never showed you, like, a good example 745 00:25:59,307 --> 00:26:00,850 of a straight relationship or something. 746 00:26:00,892 --> 00:26:02,394 And that's why I'm gay? 747 00:26:02,435 --> 00:26:04,020 Probably. 748 00:26:04,062 --> 00:26:05,438 Not because I'm born this way? 749 00:26:05,480 --> 00:26:06,856 What am I, a fuckin' scientist? 750 00:26:06,898 --> 00:26:08,400 I don't know. 751 00:26:08,441 --> 00:26:10,569 Or because I like your D very much. 752 00:26:12,153 --> 00:26:13,488 No. 753 00:26:13,530 --> 00:26:14,406 Nothing to do with that. 754 00:26:14,447 --> 00:26:15,782 Don't fuckin' stop. 755 00:26:15,824 --> 00:26:18,368 So this that I'm doing with my hand right now... 756 00:26:18,410 --> 00:26:19,911 only has to do with Fiona's shitty boyfriends? 757 00:26:19,953 --> 00:26:21,746 Exactly. 758 00:26:23,290 --> 00:26:24,249 Oh! 759 00:26:24,291 --> 00:26:25,333 percussive music 760 00:26:26,710 --> 00:26:28,211 Maybe you buy me a drink to make up for it? 761 00:26:28,253 --> 00:26:29,588 You think I wanna buy you a fuckin' drink? 762 00:26:29,629 --> 00:26:30,880 Here we go. 763 00:26:30,922 --> 00:26:32,215 -So no? -You know, apparently, 764 00:26:32,257 --> 00:26:34,092 you can break their fuckin' nose, and still, 765 00:26:34,134 --> 00:26:36,052 they think you wanna fuck them. 766 00:26:36,094 --> 00:26:37,095 You know why? 767 00:26:37,137 --> 00:26:38,680 'Cause all men are fuckin' scum! 768 00:26:38,722 --> 00:26:40,515 All of them! 769 00:26:40,557 --> 00:26:41,933 Can you believe that this guy today 770 00:26:41,975 --> 00:26:43,435 told me I was complicated? 771 00:26:43,476 --> 00:26:44,436 Yes. 772 00:26:44,477 --> 00:26:45,854 Are you serious? How? 773 00:26:45,895 --> 00:26:47,606 You married that guy after, like, a week. 774 00:26:47,647 --> 00:26:49,232 There's a little part of me that wonders 775 00:26:49,274 --> 00:26:50,775 if we didn't make a big fuckin' mistake. 776 00:26:50,817 --> 00:26:52,110 Then let's make it the most fun 777 00:26:52,152 --> 00:26:53,987 big fuckin' mistake we ever made. 778 00:26:54,029 --> 00:26:56,323 And you cheated on him with your car thief ex-boyfriend. 779 00:26:56,364 --> 00:26:57,490 I slept with my ex. 780 00:26:57,532 --> 00:26:59,534 This must be the hubby. 781 00:26:59,576 --> 00:27:01,161 How's it going, man? How you doing? 782 00:27:01,202 --> 00:27:02,495 Oh, my God! 783 00:27:02,537 --> 00:27:03,788 -God! -What the fuck? 784 00:27:03,830 --> 00:27:05,165 Nice to meet you! 785 00:27:05,206 --> 00:27:06,333 You had several different names. 786 00:27:06,374 --> 00:27:07,876 Everything's great, Jimmy-Steve. 787 00:27:07,917 --> 00:27:09,085 His name's Jimmy now. 788 00:27:09,127 --> 00:27:10,629 Steve was just a--an alias he used 789 00:27:10,670 --> 00:27:12,005 to lie to me about who he really was. 790 00:27:12,047 --> 00:27:14,341 Ooh, not cool, Jimmy-Steve. 791 00:27:14,382 --> 00:27:15,675 Fuck that. And I'm calling him Steve. 792 00:27:15,717 --> 00:27:17,344 Jack's a good thief, Fiona, 793 00:27:17,385 --> 00:27:18,553 but a shitty person. 794 00:27:18,595 --> 00:27:19,888 Jack. 795 00:27:19,929 --> 00:27:21,765 Why does my name have to make a difference? 796 00:27:21,806 --> 00:27:23,725 Almost married a heroin addict. 797 00:27:23,767 --> 00:27:25,310 He might seem like a good guy, 798 00:27:25,352 --> 00:27:27,562 but I thought the same thing when he was my fiancé, 799 00:27:27,604 --> 00:27:28,980 and he lies, and he steals, 800 00:27:29,022 --> 00:27:30,315 and if you're ever fucking 801 00:27:30,357 --> 00:27:31,983 and you notice track marks on his arms, 802 00:27:32,025 --> 00:27:33,610 maybe don't keep fucking! 803 00:27:33,652 --> 00:27:35,320 Fiona? 804 00:27:35,362 --> 00:27:37,155 You're back on drugs? 805 00:27:37,197 --> 00:27:38,823 Oh, my God. 806 00:27:38,865 --> 00:27:40,283 You bastard! 807 00:27:40,325 --> 00:27:41,451 Didn't you also get fired from a job 808 00:27:41,493 --> 00:27:42,619 for fucking her boss's brother? 809 00:27:42,661 --> 00:27:43,495 Oh, yeah. 810 00:27:45,205 --> 00:27:46,456 Tell me what you told Mike. 811 00:27:46,498 --> 00:27:47,832 The truth! He needed to know. 812 00:27:47,874 --> 00:27:49,000 Oh! 813 00:27:49,042 --> 00:27:50,251 Fuck you. 814 00:27:51,294 --> 00:27:52,462 I'd like you to leave now. 815 00:27:52,504 --> 00:27:53,797 Okay, I get it. 816 00:27:53,838 --> 00:27:55,173 I'm complicated. 817 00:27:55,215 --> 00:27:57,384 -Oh, I can keep going. -Oh, fuck you guys. 818 00:27:57,425 --> 00:27:59,511 Is it weird that I'm attracted to you now more than ever? 819 00:27:59,552 --> 00:28:00,720 Are you asking me on a date? 820 00:28:00,762 --> 00:28:02,305 Guys, Fiona, from the diner. 821 00:28:03,848 --> 00:28:05,392 This is my girlfriend, Gigi. 822 00:28:05,433 --> 00:28:07,018 -Your girlfriend? -I live with him. 823 00:28:07,060 --> 00:28:08,645 That is so funny. 824 00:28:08,687 --> 00:28:10,313 -Bye. -You're leavin'? 825 00:28:10,355 --> 00:28:11,773 Have a nice life, Fiona. 826 00:28:11,815 --> 00:28:14,025 Hey, Jimmy, I just wanted to say, go fuck yourself. 827 00:28:16,152 --> 00:28:17,362 He didn't even have the balls to dump me in person. 828 00:28:17,404 --> 00:28:18,613 Car thief. 829 00:28:18,655 --> 00:28:20,323 Lied about his name for months. 830 00:28:20,365 --> 00:28:22,283 I'm just pissed I wasted two years of my life. 831 00:28:22,325 --> 00:28:24,452 Have a good life, fuckin' asshole! 832 00:28:24,494 --> 00:28:25,995 Holy shit. You're a fuckin' asshole. 833 00:28:26,037 --> 00:28:26,871 Asshole. 834 00:28:28,915 --> 00:28:30,166 Hi. Is Ford here? 835 00:28:30,208 --> 00:28:31,209 I'm his wife. 836 00:28:31,251 --> 00:28:32,544 -Fiona. 837 00:28:32,585 --> 00:28:34,045 I'm such a fuckin' idiot. 838 00:28:34,087 --> 00:28:35,296 Fiona, wait. 839 00:28:35,338 --> 00:28:36,548 Take your fucking hands off my car. 840 00:28:36,589 --> 00:28:37,382 -Don't do this, Fiona. -Take your fucking-- 841 00:28:37,424 --> 00:28:38,633 No, I fucking--no! 842 00:28:38,675 --> 00:28:40,051 Take your fucking hands off my car! 843 00:28:40,093 --> 00:28:41,052 Fiona! 844 00:28:42,429 --> 00:28:43,888 Holy shit. 845 00:28:43,930 --> 00:28:45,640 That looks terrible. 846 00:28:45,682 --> 00:28:47,392 Like, my brain is rejecting 847 00:28:47,434 --> 00:28:49,728 that an otherwise very hot girl can look this bad. 848 00:28:49,769 --> 00:28:51,062 Just want my tools back. 849 00:28:51,104 --> 00:28:52,689 Tell me how much you want for the tools. 850 00:28:55,442 --> 00:28:56,401 I'm done with men. 851 00:28:56,443 --> 00:28:57,861 My instincts suck. 852 00:28:57,902 --> 00:28:59,779 No shithead radar. 853 00:28:59,821 --> 00:29:01,114 I was surprised to hear from you on Facebook. 854 00:29:01,156 --> 00:29:02,615 You were always with that bitchy cheerleader. 855 00:29:02,657 --> 00:29:04,492 What was her name? Lucy Jo? 856 00:29:04,534 --> 00:29:05,785 -You mean my wife. -Oh, shit. 857 00:29:06,995 --> 00:29:09,539 -Seriously? 858 00:29:09,581 --> 00:29:10,749 -Bitch! 859 00:29:10,790 --> 00:29:12,625 That's for fucking my husband! 860 00:29:12,667 --> 00:29:13,752 -Remember me? -Shit! 861 00:29:13,793 --> 00:29:15,128 Lucy Jo Heisner? 862 00:29:15,170 --> 00:29:16,337 Why would he tell her? 863 00:29:16,379 --> 00:29:18,131 'Cause you chose a pussy. 864 00:29:18,173 --> 00:29:19,632 You always pick pussies. 865 00:29:19,674 --> 00:29:21,050 Wh-- 866 00:29:21,092 --> 00:29:22,844 You can't just keep showing up. 867 00:29:22,886 --> 00:29:24,220 You have to let me go. 868 00:29:24,262 --> 00:29:26,306 You have to let me let you go. 869 00:29:26,347 --> 00:29:28,099 I need you to do that for me. 870 00:29:28,141 --> 00:29:30,101 Take care of yourself, Fiona Gallagher. 871 00:29:30,143 --> 00:29:32,020 You take care of yourself, 872 00:29:32,061 --> 00:29:34,063 whatever the hell your real name is. 873 00:29:35,940 --> 00:29:37,108 Open up. 874 00:29:38,401 --> 00:29:39,694 Holy fuck. Is that Ford? 875 00:29:39,736 --> 00:29:41,446 -Yeah. -Someone help, please! 876 00:29:41,488 --> 00:29:43,114 Does a paintball gun hurt? 877 00:29:43,156 --> 00:29:44,741 -Oh, fuck, yeah. -Not if you deserve it. 878 00:29:48,077 --> 00:29:50,246 This is my wedding day. Please don't fuck it up. 879 00:29:50,288 --> 00:29:52,624 Oh, yeah, I know you, Seanie boy. 880 00:29:52,665 --> 00:29:54,626 Takes a dope fiend to know a dope fiend, 881 00:29:54,667 --> 00:29:55,919 and you are world class. 882 00:29:55,960 --> 00:29:57,420 Is that true? 883 00:29:57,462 --> 00:29:59,798 Oh, he's a junkie, through and through, 884 00:29:59,839 --> 00:30:01,800 your husband-to-be. 885 00:30:06,179 --> 00:30:07,806 Hi, Fiona! 886 00:30:07,847 --> 00:30:09,307 She can't hear you, V. 887 00:30:09,349 --> 00:30:11,309 -I know, Kevin. -She lives in Florida. 888 00:30:11,351 --> 00:30:12,977 I mean, your voice is loud, but not that loud. 889 00:30:13,019 --> 00:30:14,187 Okay, whatever. 890 00:30:14,229 --> 00:30:16,815 Fiona. 891 00:30:16,856 --> 00:30:18,650 What can I say about my girl? 892 00:30:18,691 --> 00:30:20,527 She is my bestie. 893 00:30:20,568 --> 00:30:23,696 When she was here, we did everything together, 894 00:30:23,738 --> 00:30:26,991 any of your typical gal-pal stuff, we did it. 895 00:30:27,033 --> 00:30:28,284 Oh! 896 00:30:28,326 --> 00:30:29,953 We goin' out tonight 897 00:30:29,994 --> 00:30:32,121 We gonna do it right 898 00:30:32,163 --> 00:30:33,832 Let's talk bachelorette party. 899 00:30:33,873 --> 00:30:34,999 Oh, I got that covered. Don't worry. 900 00:30:35,041 --> 00:30:36,876 'Cause we gon' be doin' it 901 00:30:36,918 --> 00:30:39,003 - Uh-huh -Let's go, let's go. 902 00:30:39,045 --> 00:30:40,463 So tell me what you're takin' 903 00:30:40,505 --> 00:30:42,173 Ahh! 904 00:30:42,215 --> 00:30:44,384 You bitches lied to me! 905 00:30:48,429 --> 00:30:49,597 Ahh... 906 00:30:49,639 --> 00:30:51,558 Voilà, ladies! 907 00:30:52,642 --> 00:30:54,352 You did it in a car? 908 00:30:54,394 --> 00:30:55,728 How romantic. 909 00:30:57,480 --> 00:30:58,606 Meg's right. 910 00:30:58,648 --> 00:31:00,358 -I am a loser. -Hey! 911 00:31:00,400 --> 00:31:01,693 You're Fiona Gallagher. 912 00:31:01,734 --> 00:31:03,695 You can do anything you set your mind to. 913 00:31:04,863 --> 00:31:05,864 I need a body. 914 00:31:05,905 --> 00:31:07,782 A real, live body? 915 00:31:07,824 --> 00:31:10,285 Not live. Thanks. 916 00:31:10,326 --> 00:31:11,703 Knew I could count on you. 917 00:31:13,913 --> 00:31:15,039 Holy shit! 918 00:31:15,081 --> 00:31:16,416 Pre-certified for a mortgage loan 919 00:31:16,457 --> 00:31:18,084 of up to $100,000. 920 00:31:18,126 --> 00:31:19,878 I mean, no offense, but giving that kind of money to you? 921 00:31:19,919 --> 00:31:20,837 Totally. 922 00:31:22,630 --> 00:31:24,591 Kevin turned down a blow job today. 923 00:31:24,632 --> 00:31:27,051 He only wants to get off inside me now. 924 00:31:27,093 --> 00:31:29,721 Obsessed with saving his spunk for having a baby. 925 00:31:29,762 --> 00:31:31,890 Look at you, the romantic. 926 00:31:31,931 --> 00:31:33,725 You drinking for the both of us. 927 00:31:33,766 --> 00:31:35,393 Once these little girls pop out, 928 00:31:35,435 --> 00:31:37,395 I'm gonna be downing my first vodka 929 00:31:37,437 --> 00:31:41,107 before the doctor even pulls her hand out of my hoo-ha. 930 00:31:41,149 --> 00:31:42,275 I want my boobs back. 931 00:31:42,317 --> 00:31:43,401 I want my life back. 932 00:31:43,443 --> 00:31:44,736 I want my husband back. 933 00:31:44,777 --> 00:31:46,613 You haven't gotten laid lately, have you? 934 00:31:46,654 --> 00:31:48,364 I need to get dressed up like a sex object 935 00:31:48,406 --> 00:31:49,741 and be objectified. 936 00:31:49,782 --> 00:31:52,118 Drinking, dancing, guys looking at my ass. 937 00:31:52,160 --> 00:31:54,746 Me and my friends, we go savage 938 00:31:54,787 --> 00:31:56,581 We 'bout to cause some damage 939 00:31:56,623 --> 00:31:58,708 My friends take advantage 940 00:31:58,750 --> 00:32:00,084 You wish that you could have it 941 00:32:00,126 --> 00:32:02,253 Do it again, automatic 942 00:32:02,295 --> 00:32:03,755 We 'bout to cause a panic 943 00:32:03,796 --> 00:32:04,839 What happened? 944 00:32:04,881 --> 00:32:07,091 -I had an orgasm. -You had an-- 945 00:32:07,133 --> 00:32:09,761 That's how horny and lonely I've been these days. 946 00:32:09,802 --> 00:32:11,387 Did I just cheat on Kev? 947 00:32:13,264 --> 00:32:14,515 Tell me, Fiona. 948 00:32:14,557 --> 00:32:16,351 How do you feel about deli meats? 949 00:32:16,392 --> 00:32:17,852 Hey, V, do you still have 950 00:32:17,894 --> 00:32:19,938 that mini camera you use for titty shots? 951 00:32:19,979 --> 00:32:21,731 He's right in there. You know what you're doing? 952 00:32:21,773 --> 00:32:23,274 Do I know how to make a man ask me for a hummer? 953 00:32:23,316 --> 00:32:25,401 Wait here. 954 00:32:25,443 --> 00:32:26,778 I got it all on tape. 955 00:32:26,819 --> 00:32:28,071 -He's nasty. -Right? 956 00:32:28,112 --> 00:32:29,781 Gotta be entrepreneurial, right? 957 00:32:29,822 --> 00:32:32,784 Ahh! 958 00:32:32,825 --> 00:32:34,619 Yeah, I guess you two were pretty close. 959 00:32:34,661 --> 00:32:35,912 "Pretty close"? 960 00:32:35,954 --> 00:32:37,914 But Fiona and I were thick as thieves. 961 00:32:37,956 --> 00:32:39,332 What? "Thick as thieves"? Bullshit. 962 00:32:39,374 --> 00:32:40,750 No, I'm serious. 963 00:32:40,792 --> 00:32:42,251 Not as thick as me and her. 964 00:32:42,293 --> 00:32:43,419 Thicker. 965 00:32:43,461 --> 00:32:45,296 Are you out of your mind? 966 00:32:45,338 --> 00:32:47,465 Am I? 967 00:32:47,507 --> 00:32:49,801 Kev, do guys get PMS? 968 00:32:49,842 --> 00:32:51,302 You asking me 969 00:32:51,344 --> 00:32:52,971 if I bleed from my nuts once a month? 970 00:32:53,012 --> 00:32:54,180 You hooked up with Tony? 971 00:32:54,222 --> 00:32:55,556 Tony's sweet. 972 00:32:55,598 --> 00:32:56,683 How charitable of you. 973 00:32:56,724 --> 00:32:58,643 Serve and protect, huh? 974 00:32:58,685 --> 00:33:01,604 Serve and protect. 975 00:33:01,646 --> 00:33:03,272 You've been acting like a dude all summer. 976 00:33:03,314 --> 00:33:05,400 Oh, it's okay for guys to play the field, but not me? 977 00:33:05,441 --> 00:33:06,776 It's okay if you want guys to start running their dicks 978 00:33:06,818 --> 00:33:07,568 through the dishwasher after they bone you. 979 00:33:07,610 --> 00:33:09,153 Shut up. 980 00:33:09,195 --> 00:33:11,322 So you won't be getting up on my Kevin anytime soon? 981 00:33:11,364 --> 00:33:12,740 Ew. He's like my brother. 982 00:33:12,782 --> 00:33:13,825 It'd be like making out with you. 983 00:33:13,866 --> 00:33:14,993 Hi. 984 00:33:16,536 --> 00:33:17,829 You just made my boy parts get bigger. 985 00:33:17,870 --> 00:33:19,414 Fuck off. 986 00:33:19,455 --> 00:33:21,082 Self-exam is no laughing matter. 987 00:33:21,124 --> 00:33:22,291 Are you serious? 988 00:33:22,333 --> 00:33:23,334 It's not a sex thing. 989 00:33:23,376 --> 00:33:24,460 It's a "save your life" thing. 990 00:33:24,502 --> 00:33:25,628 Shit. What is the word again? 991 00:33:25,670 --> 00:33:26,921 -Malignant. - Malignant. 992 00:33:26,963 --> 00:33:28,131 Raise your arms, Fiona, 993 00:33:28,172 --> 00:33:29,340 because "malignant" is not a word 994 00:33:29,382 --> 00:33:30,466 you ever want to have to remember. 995 00:33:30,508 --> 00:33:31,801 Thank you. 996 00:33:31,843 --> 00:33:32,844 -Okay. -All right, you're good. 997 00:33:32,885 --> 00:33:34,470 Okay. 998 00:33:34,512 --> 00:33:35,680 Since when do you work at the Laundromat? 999 00:33:35,722 --> 00:33:36,806 I own the place. 1000 00:33:36,848 --> 00:33:38,182 It seemed like it would be easy. 1001 00:33:38,224 --> 00:33:40,184 You know, a half a dozen washing machines, 1002 00:33:40,226 --> 00:33:41,519 nice cash flow. 1003 00:33:41,561 --> 00:33:43,813 I-I thought that I was seizing an opportunity, 1004 00:33:43,855 --> 00:33:45,231 and now I feel like a fuckin' idiot. 1005 00:33:49,569 --> 00:33:51,821 I don't know what we're laughing about. 1006 00:33:52,905 --> 00:33:54,198 Hey, listen up, everyone. 1007 00:33:54,240 --> 00:33:55,742 I'm offering free drinks 1008 00:33:55,783 --> 00:33:57,577 if you come help me out right now for a few hours. 1009 00:33:57,618 --> 00:33:59,662 -Hey. -I brought help. 1010 00:33:59,704 --> 00:34:01,330 Christ. What a shit show. 1011 00:34:01,372 --> 00:34:03,875 I got tools in my truck. I'll go grab 'em. 1012 00:34:03,916 --> 00:34:05,960 Everybody, shovel all this broken tile out. 1013 00:34:06,002 --> 00:34:07,128 Get it the hell out of here. 1014 00:34:07,170 --> 00:34:10,798 uplifting music 1015 00:34:10,840 --> 00:34:12,550 I don't know how I'd do it without you guys. 1016 00:34:12,592 --> 00:34:14,552 You know that Jagermeister really makes you chatty. 1017 00:34:14,594 --> 00:34:16,846 -Right? 1018 00:34:16,888 --> 00:34:18,389 Okay, fine. 1019 00:34:18,431 --> 00:34:21,476 You and Fiona had a nice relationship. 1020 00:34:21,517 --> 00:34:23,978 She was the best girl friend I've ever had. 1021 00:34:24,020 --> 00:34:26,564 She was the only girl friend you ever had. 1022 00:34:26,606 --> 00:34:28,024 That's because anytime I tried to make friends 1023 00:34:28,066 --> 00:34:30,068 with other women, they always wanted to fuck me. 1024 00:34:30,109 --> 00:34:32,361 -Oh, is that what it was? -Yeah. 1025 00:34:32,403 --> 00:34:34,322 Fiona's the only woman who's never wanted to fuck me. 1026 00:34:34,363 --> 00:34:36,282 Because she's like a sister to us. 1027 00:34:36,324 --> 00:34:37,742 She's family. 1028 00:34:37,784 --> 00:34:39,077 Ew, you're right. 1029 00:34:39,118 --> 00:34:40,578 Thank God she never wanted to fuck me. 1030 00:34:40,620 --> 00:34:42,455 Yep. Thank God. 1031 00:34:43,831 --> 00:34:45,374 Am I camera ready or what? 1032 00:34:45,416 --> 00:34:46,292 Ow! 1033 00:34:46,334 --> 00:34:47,376 upbeat music 1034 00:34:47,418 --> 00:34:48,753 Yes, baby. 1035 00:34:53,966 --> 00:34:55,927 You don't actually have to get married, do you? 1036 00:34:55,968 --> 00:34:57,428 What's the point, then? 1037 00:34:57,470 --> 00:34:59,764 All the free shit, baby. 1038 00:34:59,806 --> 00:35:00,848 -Oh! - Hey! 1039 00:35:00,890 --> 00:35:01,891 -Oh, damn. -Ooh, baby, come on. 1040 00:35:01,933 --> 00:35:03,893 Okay, Gallaghers. 1041 00:35:03,935 --> 00:35:06,854 You're the only family I got, so let's put this on film, huh? 1042 00:35:09,649 --> 00:35:10,900 - I might not mind 1043 00:35:10,942 --> 00:35:12,610 having a baby Kev running around. 1044 00:35:12,652 --> 00:35:15,113 Little tomorrow person. 1045 00:35:15,154 --> 00:35:16,531 What? 1046 00:35:16,572 --> 00:35:18,366 Well, that's what I call little mixed-race babies. 1047 00:35:18,407 --> 00:35:21,285 Little people of tomorrow. 1048 00:35:21,327 --> 00:35:22,620 If it is a boy-- 1049 00:35:22,662 --> 00:35:24,205 If it is a boy, you gotta circumcise. 1050 00:35:24,247 --> 00:35:26,124 I mean, have you ever seen one that's uncut? 1051 00:35:26,165 --> 00:35:27,583 You don't know what's going on up in there. 1052 00:35:27,625 --> 00:35:29,293 It does not make you wanna go downtown, 1053 00:35:29,335 --> 00:35:31,254 and you want your kid to get his share of head, right? 1054 00:35:31,295 --> 00:35:32,588 Thank you! 1055 00:35:36,634 --> 00:35:38,928 -What's going on with him? -He had a vasectomy. 1056 00:35:38,970 --> 00:35:40,638 -Little swelling. - Little swelling. 1057 00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:42,640 My ball's the size of a grapefruit, V. 1058 00:35:44,725 --> 00:35:47,311 Kevin and I got into a fight. 1059 00:35:47,353 --> 00:35:49,021 Screw that. 1060 00:35:49,063 --> 00:35:50,648 -Fi... -No. 1061 00:35:50,690 --> 00:35:52,316 -Screw that. -Fiona. 1062 00:35:52,358 --> 00:35:53,484 I'm out of my mind 1063 00:35:53,526 --> 00:35:55,153 'cause you and V are the only things 1064 00:35:55,194 --> 00:35:57,363 that have ever made sense to me in this whole fucked-up world. 1065 00:35:57,405 --> 00:35:59,866 I swear to God, if you leave V-- 1066 00:35:59,907 --> 00:36:00,867 -You're leaving V? -No! 1067 00:36:00,908 --> 00:36:02,618 Fiona, what the hell? 1068 00:36:02,660 --> 00:36:05,037 soft music 1069 00:36:05,079 --> 00:36:07,456 I'm sorry, but I would never leave you. 1070 00:36:07,498 --> 00:36:09,083 You gotta know that. 1071 00:36:11,377 --> 00:36:15,339 After everything we've been through, 1072 00:36:15,381 --> 00:36:17,300 you kind of just have to know that. 1073 00:36:21,679 --> 00:36:23,014 Whoa. 1074 00:36:23,055 --> 00:36:25,016 You just snotted the whole table. 1075 00:36:27,059 --> 00:36:28,477 Thank you, thank you, 1076 00:36:28,519 --> 00:36:30,021 but I'm not actually a stripper. 1077 00:36:30,062 --> 00:36:31,522 Shut up. Take the cash. 1078 00:36:31,564 --> 00:36:32,440 Yeah! 1079 00:36:32,481 --> 00:36:33,774 Thank you. 1080 00:36:33,816 --> 00:36:35,985 I've never dranken from a penis before. 1081 00:36:39,906 --> 00:36:42,783 So it's come to this, huh? 1082 00:36:42,825 --> 00:36:45,161 You wanna know about Fiona. 1083 00:36:45,203 --> 00:36:48,206 The perspective only a father can give. 1084 00:36:48,247 --> 00:36:51,042 I have a lot to say, you know, 1085 00:36:51,083 --> 00:36:54,378 but first, am I getting paid for this? 1086 00:36:54,420 --> 00:36:57,590 It might determine just how juicy the details are 1087 00:36:57,632 --> 00:36:58,674 that I give you. 1088 00:36:58,716 --> 00:37:00,301 Uh-huh. 1089 00:37:00,343 --> 00:37:02,637 Otherwise, suit yourself. 1090 00:37:02,678 --> 00:37:05,348 You get what you get from me. 1091 00:37:05,389 --> 00:37:09,602 Anyway, what can I say? 1092 00:37:09,644 --> 00:37:12,730 Fiona, Fiona, Fiona, Fiona, Fiona. 1093 00:37:15,483 --> 00:37:17,109 Frank? Frank! Frank. 1094 00:37:17,151 --> 00:37:18,486 Fuck, Frank! 1095 00:37:18,527 --> 00:37:20,321 Frank, what the hell is going on? 1096 00:37:20,363 --> 00:37:23,908 As of right now, you are officially on the wagon. 1097 00:37:23,950 --> 00:37:25,326 Are those my jeans, Frank? 1098 00:37:25,368 --> 00:37:26,994 You're not leaving Hymie here, Frank. 1099 00:37:27,036 --> 00:37:28,663 This isn't a DUI, Frank. 1100 00:37:28,704 --> 00:37:29,914 You're a fuckin' asshole, Frank. 1101 00:37:29,956 --> 00:37:31,374 You look like shit, Frank. 1102 00:37:31,415 --> 00:37:32,833 The doctor talk to you, Frank? 1103 00:37:32,875 --> 00:37:34,418 Yeah. "Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. 1104 00:37:34,460 --> 00:37:36,045 Stop drinking. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah." 1105 00:37:36,087 --> 00:37:37,922 Why does it always come down to Frank? 1106 00:37:37,964 --> 00:37:38,839 Oh, fuck, Frank. 1107 00:37:38,881 --> 00:37:39,757 Piss off, Frank. 1108 00:37:39,799 --> 00:37:41,717 Sleep in your room, Frank. 1109 00:37:41,759 --> 00:37:43,010 What you need, Frank? 1110 00:37:43,052 --> 00:37:45,096 Frank, what are they doing in our yard? 1111 00:37:46,097 --> 00:37:47,431 Enough with the kicking! 1112 00:37:47,473 --> 00:37:48,599 Christ! 1113 00:37:48,641 --> 00:37:50,434 Frank, one more word, 1114 00:37:50,476 --> 00:37:52,687 you'll be sharing a mattress with your friends out back. 1115 00:37:52,728 --> 00:37:54,063 Let's not be hasty. 1116 00:37:54,105 --> 00:37:55,940 You are not part of this conversation, Frank. 1117 00:37:55,982 --> 00:37:58,526 Would you happen to have a spare bed for your old pops? 1118 00:37:58,567 --> 00:37:59,485 No. 1119 00:37:59,527 --> 00:38:00,528 -Hey, Frank. -Frank. 1120 00:38:00,569 --> 00:38:01,779 Frank. Frank. Frank. 1121 00:38:01,821 --> 00:38:02,947 Frank. Frank. Frank. Frank. 1122 00:38:02,989 --> 00:38:04,240 Frank. Frank. Frank. Frank. Frank. 1123 00:38:04,282 --> 00:38:05,157 Frank. Frank. Frank. Frank. Frank. Frank. 1124 00:38:05,199 --> 00:38:06,200 Frank. Frank. Frank! 1125 00:38:06,242 --> 00:38:07,868 I go by Francis now. 1126 00:38:08,744 --> 00:38:11,706 upbeat music 1127 00:38:18,879 --> 00:38:20,464 -So strident. 1128 00:38:23,301 --> 00:38:25,928 Chip off the old block. 1129 00:38:25,970 --> 00:38:27,513 Like father, like daughter. 1130 00:38:27,555 --> 00:38:30,099 The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. 1131 00:38:30,141 --> 00:38:33,811 These expressions don't begin to describe 1132 00:38:33,853 --> 00:38:36,856 how similar me and the heir to my throne are... 1133 00:38:39,650 --> 00:38:42,236 ...starting with our work ethic. 1134 00:38:44,030 --> 00:38:46,157 Tell me what my benefits would be 1135 00:38:46,198 --> 00:38:47,992 if I were to retire right now. 1136 00:38:48,034 --> 00:38:50,578 It says here you only worked six weeks your entire life. 1137 00:38:50,619 --> 00:38:52,330 Well... 1138 00:38:52,371 --> 00:38:54,165 if you mean a "formal" job. 1139 00:38:54,206 --> 00:38:56,667 -What are we doing today? -Biohazard. 1140 00:38:56,709 --> 00:38:59,086 Got a few blocks of raw sewage down there. 1141 00:39:02,715 --> 00:39:04,550 That's the problem with working. 1142 00:39:04,592 --> 00:39:06,218 Too much instability. 1143 00:39:06,260 --> 00:39:07,845 Stress. 1144 00:39:07,887 --> 00:39:09,013 I saw the "help wanted" sign. 1145 00:39:09,055 --> 00:39:10,931 It's minimum wage, nights. 1146 00:39:10,973 --> 00:39:11,974 I need a job. 1147 00:39:14,310 --> 00:39:15,811 Get a job, Frank. 1148 00:39:15,853 --> 00:39:17,772 Well, now, why would I do that, Gail? 1149 00:39:17,813 --> 00:39:19,607 How do you think we made it all these years, huh? 1150 00:39:19,648 --> 00:39:21,233 You ready, big man? Come on. 1151 00:39:21,275 --> 00:39:22,485 Busting my ass, 1152 00:39:22,526 --> 00:39:23,694 working eight jobs... 1153 00:39:23,736 --> 00:39:24,820 Who's got the jumbo dog? 1154 00:39:24,862 --> 00:39:25,780 How'd you know? 1155 00:39:25,821 --> 00:39:26,947 X-ray vision. 1156 00:39:28,032 --> 00:39:29,658 Keep the change, darling. 1157 00:39:32,995 --> 00:39:35,539 "Your Illinois State work compensation 1158 00:39:35,581 --> 00:39:37,124 has been terminated"! 1159 00:39:37,166 --> 00:39:39,043 No! 1160 00:39:41,253 --> 00:39:42,338 Gotta find a job. 1161 00:39:42,380 --> 00:39:43,964 Show me the special list. 1162 00:39:44,006 --> 00:39:45,549 These are the jobs nobody wants. 1163 00:39:45,591 --> 00:39:48,719 Conditions are hazardous, unsafe, or both. 1164 00:39:48,761 --> 00:39:50,012 You're guaranteed to get hurt. 1165 00:39:50,054 --> 00:39:52,723 Good man, Gary. 1166 00:39:52,765 --> 00:39:55,059 Serious injuries that occur each year 1167 00:39:55,101 --> 00:39:57,728 show that a forklift can be dangerous. 1168 00:39:57,770 --> 00:39:59,730 I don't like that you're getting hurt on purpose 1169 00:39:59,772 --> 00:40:01,315 to make money; isn't that cheating? 1170 00:40:01,357 --> 00:40:03,317 I prefer to think of it as helping. 1171 00:40:03,359 --> 00:40:05,194 -You do? -When I collect workman's comp, 1172 00:40:05,236 --> 00:40:07,071 some lady has to fill out the paperwork. 1173 00:40:07,113 --> 00:40:10,199 Wasn't for me, she'd be unemployed. 1174 00:40:10,241 --> 00:40:13,202 Well, it's back to the grindstone for this guy. 1175 00:40:13,244 --> 00:40:14,703 -Whoa! -Oh, careful, Frank. 1176 00:40:14,745 --> 00:40:15,746 That spill almost got you there. 1177 00:40:15,788 --> 00:40:17,081 Huh. 1178 00:40:17,123 --> 00:40:18,541 Already lost one best work friend. 1179 00:40:18,582 --> 00:40:20,793 Don't need to lose another so soon. 1180 00:40:20,835 --> 00:40:24,588 dance music 1181 00:40:24,630 --> 00:40:26,715 Gotta find something more permanent. 1182 00:40:26,757 --> 00:40:28,300 Tell Juan that Kim sent you. 1183 00:40:28,342 --> 00:40:30,094 It's not hookin', right? 1184 00:40:30,136 --> 00:40:30,970 It is hooking? 1185 00:40:31,011 --> 00:40:32,888 I'm barely scraping by. 1186 00:40:32,930 --> 00:40:35,433 I've been cleaning a dead body out of an apartment all day. 1187 00:40:35,474 --> 00:40:37,268 Oh, my God. No, no, no. 1188 00:40:37,309 --> 00:40:38,436 Oh, fuck. 1189 00:40:38,477 --> 00:40:41,355 You've gone and died, Billy! 1190 00:40:41,397 --> 00:40:42,773 No, no, no! 1191 00:40:42,815 --> 00:40:44,108 Ugh. 1192 00:40:44,150 --> 00:40:45,317 Paramedics are on the way. 1193 00:40:45,359 --> 00:40:49,113 I can't stay here and watch them zip him up. 1194 00:40:49,155 --> 00:40:50,781 -What's up, Frank? -Big score. 1195 00:40:50,823 --> 00:40:52,158 Fresh dead guy. 1196 00:40:52,199 --> 00:40:53,117 You diggin' that smell? 1197 00:40:53,159 --> 00:40:54,535 Something die in here? 1198 00:40:54,577 --> 00:40:56,787 Maggots, roaches, rats, flies. 1199 00:40:56,829 --> 00:40:58,205 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. 1200 00:40:58,247 --> 00:40:59,623 -Oh, my God. -Keep your mouth shut. 1201 00:40:59,665 --> 00:41:01,083 And I don't mean "shut up." 1202 00:41:01,125 --> 00:41:02,793 I mean don't let anything splash in your mouth. 1203 00:41:02,835 --> 00:41:04,378 I want you to break my leg. 1204 00:41:04,420 --> 00:41:05,880 I need the insurance money. 1205 00:41:05,921 --> 00:41:07,465 If you love me, son, you'll do this. 1206 00:41:07,506 --> 00:41:08,716 Can I put it on YouTube? 1207 00:41:08,757 --> 00:41:09,758 Sh-- 1208 00:41:11,302 --> 00:41:12,970 No. 1209 00:41:13,012 --> 00:41:13,929 It's time for the talk. 1210 00:41:13,971 --> 00:41:14,972 "The talk"? 1211 00:41:15,014 --> 00:41:16,182 The 401 talk. 1212 00:41:17,892 --> 00:41:19,310 Oh, fuck! Ah! Ahh! 1213 00:41:19,351 --> 00:41:20,519 You're eligible to participate. 1214 00:41:20,561 --> 00:41:22,521 What's a 401? 1215 00:41:22,563 --> 00:41:25,941 What, I'm supposed to take off work to go do this? 1216 00:41:25,983 --> 00:41:28,694 Of course not, because, uh, as you know, 1217 00:41:28,736 --> 00:41:30,196 this injury's prevented you from working. 1218 00:41:30,237 --> 00:41:31,655 -Remember? -Oh, shit. 1219 00:41:31,697 --> 00:41:33,282 I got a meeting today. 1220 00:41:33,324 --> 00:41:34,533 I'm gonna start looking at commercial properties. 1221 00:41:34,575 --> 00:41:36,619 You don't have much in the way of work history. 1222 00:41:36,660 --> 00:41:38,829 Been a stay-at-home dad most of my life. 1223 00:41:38,871 --> 00:41:40,164 What do you think the rental increase 1224 00:41:40,206 --> 00:41:41,832 per square foot is gonna be year to year 1225 00:41:41,874 --> 00:41:43,042 with gentrification? 1226 00:41:43,083 --> 00:41:44,502 -At least 20 percent. -Really? 1227 00:41:44,543 --> 00:41:46,629 Aren't things actually leveling off? 1228 00:41:46,670 --> 00:41:49,173 I got kicked out of the military 1229 00:41:49,215 --> 00:41:50,716 'cause I couldn't get enough of his cock. 1230 00:41:53,802 --> 00:41:54,887 Thank you. 1231 00:41:54,929 --> 00:41:56,722 -Oh, thank you. -Oorah. 1232 00:41:57,890 --> 00:41:58,849 So what the hell, Whitford? 1233 00:41:58,891 --> 00:42:00,142 Do you think I'm not smart enough? 1234 00:42:00,184 --> 00:42:02,436 Or you just like making women feel like 1235 00:42:02,478 --> 00:42:04,188 they need to fuck you to join an LLC? 1236 00:42:04,230 --> 00:42:06,273 I see you visited our hospital 52 times, 1237 00:42:06,315 --> 00:42:07,274 and you have no insurance. 1238 00:42:07,316 --> 00:42:09,360 Difficulty securing employment 1239 00:42:09,401 --> 00:42:10,861 in this challenging economy. 1240 00:42:10,903 --> 00:42:12,780 Unemployment rate is under 4 percent. 1241 00:42:12,821 --> 00:42:14,532 We're hiring janitors without hands. 1242 00:42:18,244 --> 00:42:22,248 Fiona learned everything she knows from me. 1243 00:42:22,289 --> 00:42:26,001 She was my A-plus student, 1244 00:42:26,043 --> 00:42:28,837 my protégé, 1245 00:42:28,879 --> 00:42:31,924 and as a result of everything I taught her, 1246 00:42:31,966 --> 00:42:34,510 she respected me, looked up to me. 1247 00:42:34,552 --> 00:42:37,346 She appreciated my ways of the world 1248 00:42:37,388 --> 00:42:40,224 and the infinite wisdom I held, 1249 00:42:40,266 --> 00:42:43,435 but because Fiona was a young spirit, 1250 00:42:43,477 --> 00:42:46,355 not experienced in life, 1251 00:42:46,397 --> 00:42:49,233 she sometimes doubted my choices-- 1252 00:42:49,275 --> 00:42:53,404 would butt in, insert herself into my process. 1253 00:42:53,445 --> 00:42:55,739 She didn't always trust that I had things 1254 00:42:55,781 --> 00:42:57,658 absolutely under control. 1255 00:42:57,700 --> 00:42:59,076 Oh, shit. Whoa! 1256 00:42:59,118 --> 00:43:00,160 rock music 1257 00:43:00,202 --> 00:43:03,038 You think... 1258 00:43:03,080 --> 00:43:05,541 Fuckin' folding you... 1259 00:43:05,583 --> 00:43:06,875 I wouldn't put him anywhere near carpet 1260 00:43:06,917 --> 00:43:08,002 till his pants dry a bit. 1261 00:43:08,043 --> 00:43:09,712 -Who the hell is that? -My dad. 1262 00:43:11,922 --> 00:43:13,757 Oh, you found our emergency fund. 1263 00:43:13,799 --> 00:43:14,842 So we're covered. 1264 00:43:14,883 --> 00:43:16,427 Oh, no. Come on, no! 1265 00:43:16,468 --> 00:43:18,846 Ahh! 1266 00:43:18,887 --> 00:43:20,681 It hurts. Need a sponge bath. 1267 00:43:20,723 --> 00:43:22,349 Jesus. 1268 00:43:22,391 --> 00:43:24,018 How long did the doctor say you were gonna be like this? 1269 00:43:24,059 --> 00:43:25,603 Fork over the cash! 1270 00:43:25,644 --> 00:43:27,104 Craig! 1271 00:43:27,146 --> 00:43:29,481 Some old-ass junkie's trying to hit us again. 1272 00:43:29,523 --> 00:43:31,066 Let's go. No, no, no, no. 1273 00:43:31,108 --> 00:43:32,610 Wait, uh, pull. Pull! 1274 00:43:32,651 --> 00:43:33,777 Oh, shit. Go! 1275 00:43:35,696 --> 00:43:38,157 Oh, what did I do this time? 1276 00:43:38,198 --> 00:43:39,742 -Jesus. -Guess who came by today. 1277 00:43:39,783 --> 00:43:41,410 The city. 1278 00:43:41,452 --> 00:43:43,621 They're digging up the yard to work on the sewer line. 1279 00:43:43,662 --> 00:43:46,165 You need to find Aunt Ginger before they do. 1280 00:43:46,206 --> 00:43:47,791 You buried her. 1281 00:43:47,833 --> 00:43:49,126 You unbury her. 1282 00:43:49,168 --> 00:43:50,294 Guys, bad news. 1283 00:43:50,336 --> 00:43:51,670 We all gotta dig tonight. 1284 00:43:51,712 --> 00:43:53,589 Frank can't find Aunt Ginger. 1285 00:43:53,631 --> 00:43:55,841 Once again, saddled with a mess we didn't create. 1286 00:43:55,883 --> 00:43:56,800 The sooner we get out there and dig, 1287 00:43:56,842 --> 00:43:57,843 the sooner it'll all be over. 1288 00:43:59,720 --> 00:44:00,638 I'll get the money. 1289 00:44:00,679 --> 00:44:02,306 I will get the money somehow. 1290 00:44:02,348 --> 00:44:03,307 I'll do it. I'll make it right. 1291 00:44:03,349 --> 00:44:04,475 I'll make it right. 1292 00:44:07,144 --> 00:44:08,145 Sir, step out of the car. 1293 00:44:10,689 --> 00:44:13,817 Ten thousand says you cannot get Tasered 1294 00:44:13,859 --> 00:44:15,319 and not soil your tighty-whities. 1295 00:44:15,361 --> 00:44:16,737 Do it! 1296 00:44:20,824 --> 00:44:22,326 Where's my fuckin' money? 1297 00:44:22,368 --> 00:44:23,577 You were serious about that? 1298 00:44:23,619 --> 00:44:25,329 We'll keep the kid as collateral. 1299 00:44:26,455 --> 00:44:27,831 -Frank! -Frank! 1300 00:44:27,873 --> 00:44:29,667 Hey. 1301 00:44:29,708 --> 00:44:32,252 Where is Liam? 1302 00:44:32,294 --> 00:44:34,338 He's at his first sleepover. 1303 00:44:35,422 --> 00:44:36,507 Who the fuck are you? 1304 00:44:36,548 --> 00:44:37,633 We want Liam back. 1305 00:44:37,675 --> 00:44:38,717 He's collateral. 1306 00:44:38,759 --> 00:44:40,052 You better start shootin'. 1307 00:44:42,429 --> 00:44:43,514 Hey. Good to see you. 1308 00:44:43,555 --> 00:44:44,515 Man, shut the fuck up. 1309 00:44:46,725 --> 00:44:47,893 Now, where the hell is our brother? 1310 00:44:47,935 --> 00:44:49,520 I didn't mean for that-- 1311 00:44:50,020 --> 00:44:53,524 Twenty questions to see if Al-Anon could be right for you. 1312 00:44:53,565 --> 00:44:55,317 - Yeah? How'd you do? -Twenty out of twenty. 1313 00:44:55,359 --> 00:44:57,069 "Have holidays or gatherings 1314 00:44:57,111 --> 00:45:00,197 ever been spoiled by a loved one's drinking?" 1315 00:45:03,450 --> 00:45:04,868 "Have you ever called the police 1316 00:45:04,910 --> 00:45:06,245 for fear of abuse?" 1317 00:45:06,286 --> 00:45:08,205 Out, or I swear to God, I'm gonna call the cops. 1318 00:45:08,247 --> 00:45:09,289 What kind of a Gallagher are you? 1319 00:45:09,331 --> 00:45:10,541 Out. 1320 00:45:10,582 --> 00:45:11,375 Are the asses in the window 1321 00:45:11,417 --> 00:45:12,209 gonna be a problem? 1322 00:45:12,251 --> 00:45:13,711 Jesus. 1323 00:45:13,752 --> 00:45:15,879 "Do you feel more alive in the midst of a crisis?" 1324 00:45:15,921 --> 00:45:19,466 Can you connect me with Child Welfare Services? 1325 00:45:19,508 --> 00:45:21,135 You're the one who called DFS on 'em 1326 00:45:21,176 --> 00:45:22,553 to have 'em taken away. 1327 00:45:22,594 --> 00:45:23,804 And what's the situation? 1328 00:45:23,846 --> 00:45:27,057 Six kids living in squalor. 1329 00:45:27,099 --> 00:45:29,059 No parental supervision. 1330 00:45:29,101 --> 00:45:32,312 "Are you uneasy when your life is going smoothly?" 1331 00:45:32,354 --> 00:45:33,647 Oh... 1332 00:45:33,689 --> 00:45:35,482 What are you doing, Frank? 1333 00:45:35,524 --> 00:45:36,859 I'm just watching you sleep. 1334 00:45:36,900 --> 00:45:38,068 Jesus Christ. 1335 00:45:38,110 --> 00:45:39,570 You're really starting to creep me out. 1336 00:45:39,611 --> 00:45:41,405 And my personal favorite, 1337 00:45:41,447 --> 00:45:42,906 "Do you care for others easily..." 1338 00:45:42,948 --> 00:45:44,783 Fuck, Frank. 1339 00:45:44,825 --> 00:45:46,201 gentle music 1340 00:45:46,243 --> 00:45:48,287 "...but find it difficult to care for yourself?" 1341 00:45:49,329 --> 00:45:50,914 Good job, Fiona. 1342 00:45:50,956 --> 00:45:54,084 I don't know how I could do this without you. 1343 00:45:54,126 --> 00:45:55,753 -Thanks for all your hard work. 1344 00:45:57,296 --> 00:45:59,715 You're welcome, Dad. 1345 00:45:59,757 --> 00:46:01,467 So there you have it. 1346 00:46:01,508 --> 00:46:04,595 My mini me, Fiona Gallagher. 1347 00:46:04,636 --> 00:46:07,598 Direct descendant of my loins. 1348 00:46:07,639 --> 00:46:10,100 We breathe the same air, 1349 00:46:10,142 --> 00:46:12,311 which, of course, is why sometimes 1350 00:46:12,352 --> 00:46:15,731 I've had to step in and school her, 1351 00:46:15,773 --> 00:46:17,691 teach her a life lesson, 1352 00:46:17,733 --> 00:46:19,985 show her the ropes, as it were. 1353 00:46:22,738 --> 00:46:26,784 Sometimes I may have inadvertently hurt her, 1354 00:46:26,825 --> 00:46:28,452 but at the end of the day, 1355 00:46:28,494 --> 00:46:31,747 I'm the one who knows what's best for her 1356 00:46:31,789 --> 00:46:33,373 because I am her. 1357 00:46:33,415 --> 00:46:34,583 upbeat music 1358 00:46:34,625 --> 00:46:36,460 Ahh! 1359 00:46:36,502 --> 00:46:38,796 -Ah! -Come here! 1360 00:46:38,837 --> 00:46:40,714 Oh, Jesus Christ. 1361 00:46:40,756 --> 00:46:42,382 Do not let that woman in. 1362 00:46:42,424 --> 00:46:43,926 The hell did you do? 1363 00:46:43,967 --> 00:46:46,553 Know how I know you fucked him? 1364 00:46:46,595 --> 00:46:49,640 He told me, you filthy penis mitten! 1365 00:46:50,682 --> 00:46:51,934 I was chased from my own house, 1366 00:46:51,975 --> 00:46:53,602 and now I'm hiding in yours. 1367 00:46:53,644 --> 00:46:54,812 Holy shit, I'm you. 1368 00:46:54,853 --> 00:46:56,647 I have waited for this day. 1369 00:46:56,688 --> 00:46:59,650 And it's you, and it's me 1370 00:46:59,691 --> 00:47:02,694 And it's us, and the new girl makes three 1371 00:47:02,736 --> 00:47:05,113 No one really knows how far you're gonna go 1372 00:47:05,155 --> 00:47:07,366 When you're swaying to the sinners revelry 1373 00:47:07,407 --> 00:47:09,451 -What? -That's my stool. 1374 00:47:12,704 --> 00:47:14,206 Well, tough shit. Looks like it's my stool now. 1375 00:47:14,248 --> 00:47:15,874 Come on, it's my stool. That's where I sit. 1376 00:47:15,916 --> 00:47:17,584 Come on. Let me sit here. 1377 00:47:17,626 --> 00:47:19,002 Get--fuck, all right. 1378 00:47:19,044 --> 00:47:20,838 Fine. Jesus. 1379 00:47:20,879 --> 00:47:23,799 Who's gonna save me, pretty baby? 1380 00:47:23,841 --> 00:47:26,802 'Cause your daddy is going down 1381 00:47:26,844 --> 00:47:29,471 I was raised by the wolves in the wild, honey child 1382 00:47:29,513 --> 00:47:32,015 Do you remember anything about last night? 1383 00:47:32,057 --> 00:47:33,475 -No. -Me neither. 1384 00:47:35,310 --> 00:47:36,770 Hey, how about that ecstasy? 1385 00:47:36,812 --> 00:47:38,146 No, thanks. 1386 00:47:38,188 --> 00:47:40,691 You already took it. 1387 00:47:40,732 --> 00:47:41,859 Hurry up in there. 1388 00:47:41,900 --> 00:47:42,860 I gotta help my mother out of bed 1389 00:47:42,901 --> 00:47:44,111 and take her to the bathroom. 1390 00:47:44,152 --> 00:47:45,445 Really putting a damper 1391 00:47:45,487 --> 00:47:46,530 on your "drink, puke, sleep" schedule, huh? 1392 00:47:46,572 --> 00:47:47,781 I can't take it anymore. 1393 00:47:47,823 --> 00:47:49,324 Your problem. Not ours. 1394 00:47:49,366 --> 00:47:51,326 -Ah! What was that? 1395 00:47:51,368 --> 00:47:52,828 Where's your grandmother? 1396 00:47:52,870 --> 00:47:53,996 Buying more supplies. 1397 00:47:54,037 --> 00:47:54,913 I'm gonna kill her. 1398 00:47:54,955 --> 00:47:56,373 I never thought I'd say this, 1399 00:47:56,415 --> 00:47:57,833 but you were right; we have to get rid of her. 1400 00:47:57,875 --> 00:47:59,126 She's putting our lives in danger. 1401 00:47:59,167 --> 00:48:00,878 I will fuck you up! 1402 00:48:00,919 --> 00:48:02,129 -Shit! -Whoa! 1403 00:48:03,171 --> 00:48:04,172 Put a hit out on her. 1404 00:48:04,214 --> 00:48:05,883 She's your mother. 1405 00:48:05,924 --> 00:48:08,886 Oh, like you haven't thought about doing that to me before. 1406 00:48:08,927 --> 00:48:10,095 We set her up? 1407 00:48:10,137 --> 00:48:11,388 Yeah, I guess that's what I mean. 1408 00:48:11,430 --> 00:48:13,181 Finally thinking like a Gallagher. 1409 00:48:13,223 --> 00:48:15,142 We could have the cops pick her up, 1410 00:48:15,183 --> 00:48:16,977 tell them it's a Chapter 405. 1411 00:48:17,019 --> 00:48:18,770 -Mental disorder? -They'd take her away. 1412 00:48:21,023 --> 00:48:22,441 Okay, so we'll clean up the meth lab, 1413 00:48:22,482 --> 00:48:24,151 air the place out, and then call the cops. 1414 00:48:24,192 --> 00:48:26,737 They'll bring her to a geriatric psych ward, 1415 00:48:26,778 --> 00:48:28,864 hold her 72 hours, do an evaluation. 1416 00:48:28,906 --> 00:48:30,741 -What if they find her normal? -Oh, get the f-- 1417 00:48:30,782 --> 00:48:32,034 Okay, you're right. 1418 00:48:32,075 --> 00:48:34,536 Welcome to the ranks of the unemployed. 1419 00:48:34,578 --> 00:48:35,704 I'm fine with it. 1420 00:48:35,746 --> 00:48:37,080 I mean, fuck them. 1421 00:48:37,122 --> 00:48:38,999 Being broke sucks, though. 1422 00:48:39,041 --> 00:48:40,083 Ah, you get used to it. 1423 00:48:40,125 --> 00:48:41,710 You just gotta be creative. 1424 00:48:41,752 --> 00:48:42,878 Buy me a beer? 1425 00:48:44,296 --> 00:48:45,505 That's funny. 1426 00:48:45,547 --> 00:48:47,591 -Fuck all of you. -Ungrateful little shits! 1427 00:48:47,633 --> 00:48:48,926 Rattin' me out. 1428 00:48:48,967 --> 00:48:50,761 That's why things I do for them-- 1429 00:48:50,802 --> 00:48:52,554 -blood, sweat, and tears... - If it weren't for me, 1430 00:48:52,596 --> 00:48:54,014 none of you NA motherfuckers would even have a job. 1431 00:48:54,056 --> 00:48:55,432 This is not how a family treats each other. 1432 00:48:55,474 --> 00:48:56,934 Can I be honest with you? 1433 00:48:56,975 --> 00:49:00,479 I am not the reason that your life is a piece of crap. 1434 00:49:00,520 --> 00:49:02,189 You came out of me a loser. 1435 00:49:04,107 --> 00:49:05,150 It's tough. 1436 00:49:05,192 --> 00:49:06,401 My parents suck, too. 1437 00:49:09,029 --> 00:49:10,697 Morning, Sweathogs. 1438 00:49:10,739 --> 00:49:11,573 Blackout. 1439 00:49:11,615 --> 00:49:12,574 We got a blackout. 1440 00:49:12,616 --> 00:49:13,951 No shit, Frank. 1441 00:49:13,992 --> 00:49:16,411 Where there's panic, there's money to be made. 1442 00:49:16,453 --> 00:49:17,621 You mean rippin' people off? 1443 00:49:17,663 --> 00:49:18,830 Completely legit. 1444 00:49:18,872 --> 00:49:20,290 Frank's Blackout Supply 1445 00:49:20,332 --> 00:49:21,333 has everything you need. 1446 00:49:21,375 --> 00:49:22,459 What's in it for me? 1447 00:49:22,501 --> 00:49:23,835 -Twenty percent? -Seventy. 1448 00:49:23,877 --> 00:49:25,921 -Thirty. -Fifty percent, final offer. 1449 00:49:25,963 --> 00:49:28,382 No one's gonna buy anything from you, Frank. 1450 00:49:28,423 --> 00:49:29,424 You're Frank. 1451 00:49:29,466 --> 00:49:30,968 Deal. 1452 00:49:31,009 --> 00:49:33,261 -Gallagher Blackout Supply. 1453 00:49:33,303 --> 00:49:35,472 Got everything you need right here, folks! 1454 00:49:35,514 --> 00:49:37,224 Who's waiting on cold, soaked rags? 1455 00:49:37,265 --> 00:49:38,892 Two waters. Two beers. 1456 00:49:38,934 --> 00:49:41,103 Could I get a battery over here? 1457 00:49:41,144 --> 00:49:42,396 Here you go. 1458 00:49:42,437 --> 00:49:43,730 Who wanted the bat-- there you go. 1459 00:49:43,772 --> 00:49:45,482 Hey. Here. Help me. 1460 00:49:45,524 --> 00:49:46,400 What are we doing? 1461 00:49:46,441 --> 00:49:47,776 We're being creative. 1462 00:49:47,818 --> 00:49:49,152 -Dump. 1463 00:49:50,821 --> 00:49:52,114 I don't-- 1464 00:49:52,155 --> 00:49:53,407 Hey, that's my kid's pool, motherfucker! 1465 00:49:53,448 --> 00:49:54,783 - Oh, shit. - Come on, come on. 1466 00:49:54,825 --> 00:49:55,450 - Oh, shit. - Come on, run, run. 1467 00:49:55,492 --> 00:49:56,660 Oh, whoa! 1468 00:49:56,702 --> 00:49:58,078 Here you go. Thank you. 1469 00:49:58,120 --> 00:49:59,413 How much to charge a phone? 1470 00:49:59,454 --> 00:50:00,914 -It's a dollar a minute. -Okay, I'll take five. 1471 00:50:00,956 --> 00:50:03,667 Beer, beer, thank you, thank you, thank you. 1472 00:50:03,709 --> 00:50:06,545 We made a shitload of money out there today. 1473 00:50:06,586 --> 00:50:08,213 You're really good at this. 1474 00:50:08,255 --> 00:50:09,881 There's your half. 1475 00:50:09,923 --> 00:50:11,341 I wanna renegotiate. 1476 00:50:11,383 --> 00:50:13,010 -The hell? -Sixty-forty, 1477 00:50:13,051 --> 00:50:16,513 or next time, I just open my own Blackout Supply, 1478 00:50:16,555 --> 00:50:20,308 and, trust me, you don't want me as your competition. 1479 00:50:20,350 --> 00:50:22,769 Thanks, Francis. 1480 00:50:24,563 --> 00:50:26,523 -All right, it's filming. -Frank, come on! 1481 00:50:27,941 --> 00:50:28,817 Go! 1482 00:50:31,236 --> 00:50:32,529 We were supposed to be done with this ten minutes ago. 1483 00:50:34,239 --> 00:50:35,824 You want me to come do it, huh? All right. 1484 00:50:35,866 --> 00:50:37,534 - Your shoulder's in me. -All right, all right, 1485 00:50:37,576 --> 00:50:39,411 -all right, all right. - That's my knee! 1486 00:50:39,453 --> 00:50:40,871 You guys ready? All right. 1487 00:50:40,912 --> 00:50:42,039 -We're good? All right. - Yeah. 1488 00:50:42,080 --> 00:50:43,123 We have one more thing we wanna say. 1489 00:50:43,165 --> 00:50:44,416 Since you're asking about Fiona... 1490 00:50:44,458 --> 00:50:45,917 ...and you all want to know about her... 1491 00:50:45,959 --> 00:50:47,377 ...there's one thing we haven't told you yet. 1492 00:50:47,419 --> 00:50:49,212 Yeah, I'm not part of this shit. 1493 00:50:49,254 --> 00:50:51,048 If someone you know is fuckin' with you... 1494 00:50:51,089 --> 00:50:52,591 Hell, if someone you don't know is fuckin' with you... 1495 00:50:52,632 --> 00:50:54,051 ...we got a piece of advice. 1496 00:50:54,092 --> 00:50:56,136 If you wanna protect your family and friends... 1497 00:50:56,178 --> 00:50:57,971 ...go Fiona on 'em! 1498 00:50:58,013 --> 00:50:59,181 - Yeah! - Pow! 1499 00:50:59,222 --> 00:51:00,182 - That'll do it. - Yeah! 1500 00:51:00,223 --> 00:51:02,059 Get out of here, you piece of shit! 1501 00:51:02,100 --> 00:51:04,519 You better run, you sick bastard! 1502 00:51:04,561 --> 00:51:06,521 You don't return my calls or my texts? 1503 00:51:06,563 --> 00:51:07,731 Stop hitting me! Ahh! God damn it! 1504 00:51:07,773 --> 00:51:09,024 Enough! 1505 00:51:09,066 --> 00:51:10,692 Tell me you didn't go all Fiona on him. 1506 00:51:10,734 --> 00:51:13,236 What have you done? What have you done? 1507 00:51:13,278 --> 00:51:14,112 Carl! 1508 00:51:14,154 --> 00:51:15,030 You left Liam where? 1509 00:51:15,072 --> 00:51:16,406 For fuck's sake, Deb. 1510 00:51:16,448 --> 00:51:17,741 Did you write a Yelp review? 1511 00:51:17,783 --> 00:51:18,950 Yeah. 1512 00:51:18,992 --> 00:51:20,285 That feels pretty bad, doesn't it, huh? 1513 00:51:20,327 --> 00:51:21,787 It's okay, baby. 1514 00:51:21,828 --> 00:51:23,413 Maybe you should stop being such an asshole, huh? 1515 00:51:23,455 --> 00:51:25,248 Go cry to your daddy about your trust fund, 1516 00:51:25,290 --> 00:51:26,291 you little bitch! 1517 00:51:26,333 --> 00:51:27,959 "Going Fiona" is not a thing. 1518 00:51:28,001 --> 00:51:29,377 Trust me. It's a thing. 1519 00:51:29,419 --> 00:51:30,420 Mind your fuckin' business. 1520 00:51:30,462 --> 00:51:31,546 Butt the fuck out. 1521 00:51:31,588 --> 00:51:32,881 Is that so fuckin' hard? 1522 00:51:32,923 --> 00:51:34,299 My heinous cunt of a half sister 1523 00:51:34,341 --> 00:51:35,258 called the fucking-- 1524 00:51:35,300 --> 00:51:36,259 No. 1525 00:51:36,301 --> 00:51:37,260 No, asshole. 1526 00:51:37,302 --> 00:51:38,595 No. Fuck, no. 1527 00:51:38,637 --> 00:51:39,721 Get the fuck outta here. 1528 00:51:39,763 --> 00:51:40,931 What the fuck was that? 1529 00:51:40,972 --> 00:51:43,600 Hey! Fuck you! 1530 00:51:43,642 --> 00:51:45,560 Oh, if they happen to-- fuck you! 1531 00:51:45,602 --> 00:51:46,937 Fuck you. Fuck you. 1532 00:51:46,978 --> 00:51:49,523 Fuck off. You fucked with the wrong girl. 1533 00:51:49,564 --> 00:51:50,816 Time to go Gallagher. 1534 00:51:50,857 --> 00:51:52,109 Nobody fucks with the Gallaghers. 1535 00:51:52,150 --> 00:51:53,944 Game on, motherfucker! 1536 00:51:53,985 --> 00:51:55,320 You fuckers! 1537 00:51:55,362 --> 00:51:56,279 God damn it. 1538 00:51:56,321 --> 00:51:57,447 The fuck are you doing here? 1539 00:51:57,489 --> 00:51:59,032 What the fuck are you doing here? 1540 00:51:59,074 --> 00:52:00,283 Well, I thought we could celebrate together. 1541 00:52:00,325 --> 00:52:02,619 Or I could stab myself in the eye with a pencil. 1542 00:52:02,661 --> 00:52:04,121 -Oh, you got a mirror? -Oh, yeah. 1543 00:52:04,162 --> 00:52:05,122 Right here. Oh, wait. 1544 00:52:05,163 --> 00:52:05,872 It's a baseball bat. 1545 00:52:05,914 --> 00:52:07,290 Hey! 1546 00:52:07,332 --> 00:52:09,126 I'll kill you with my bare fuckin' hands. 1547 00:52:09,167 --> 00:52:10,293 They are goin' down. 1548 00:52:10,335 --> 00:52:11,503 Smoke bomb. Fuck! 1549 00:52:12,504 --> 00:52:14,714 Shit. 1550 00:52:14,756 --> 00:52:15,632 Did you go all Fiona on him? 1551 00:52:15,674 --> 00:52:17,050 That is not a thing. 1552 00:52:17,092 --> 00:52:19,344 I am sick of gettin' fucked. 1553 00:52:19,386 --> 00:52:21,138 South Side! 1554 00:52:21,179 --> 00:52:22,347 I don't need you to stand up for me! 1555 00:52:22,389 --> 00:52:23,473 I can stand up for myself! 1556 00:52:23,515 --> 00:52:24,307 The Laundromat is closed! 1557 00:52:24,349 --> 00:52:25,684 I have had a shitty day! 1558 00:52:25,725 --> 00:52:26,852 -Rubbed his dick-- 1559 00:52:26,893 --> 00:52:28,186 Shut up! Go cry to your-- 1560 00:52:28,228 --> 00:52:29,437 Motherfucker. Huh? 1561 00:52:29,479 --> 00:52:31,314 -I don't need... - Fiona, come on! 1562 00:52:31,356 --> 00:52:32,816 - ...your money! - Little help, please? 1563 00:52:32,858 --> 00:52:34,151 Get out of here, Ford. Get her some water. 1564 00:52:34,192 --> 00:52:35,986 I don't need anything from you! Asshole! 1565 00:52:39,072 --> 00:52:41,324 Is this fun or what? 1566 00:52:47,747 --> 00:52:50,208 When I was young 1567 00:52:50,250 --> 00:52:52,169 I remember 1568 00:52:54,212 --> 00:52:56,673 I was taught not to say the F word 1569 00:52:56,715 --> 00:52:58,842 Ugh! Ow! Fuck. 1570 00:52:58,884 --> 00:53:00,677 I guess I forgot 1571 00:53:00,719 --> 00:53:05,140 As a grown man with an open heart inside 1572 00:53:05,182 --> 00:53:07,601 I got married to the F word 1573 00:53:07,642 --> 00:53:09,936 And my heart slowly died 1574 00:53:09,978 --> 00:53:11,354 F is for Fiona 1575 00:53:11,396 --> 00:53:14,024 What my family is has fuck-all to do with you. 1576 00:53:15,984 --> 00:53:18,820 With her fists of flailing fire 1577 00:53:21,323 --> 00:53:22,949 F is for Fiona 1578 00:53:22,991 --> 00:53:24,492 Coming! 1579 00:53:27,412 --> 00:53:29,581 I felt like I could fly 1580 00:53:31,082 --> 00:53:32,042 But then 1581 00:53:32,083 --> 00:53:37,047 Fucking Fiona 1582 00:53:37,088 --> 00:53:39,257 Was fucking everyone 1583 00:53:40,217 --> 00:53:41,384 What are you waitin' for? 1584 00:53:41,426 --> 00:53:45,388 So fuck you, Fiona 1585 00:53:45,430 --> 00:53:49,184 'Cause now I'm fucking done 1586 00:53:49,226 --> 00:53:50,352 You were fuckin' right, 1587 00:53:50,393 --> 00:53:51,728 and we were fuckin' wrong, Fiona. 1588 00:53:54,105 --> 00:53:59,110 Fuck you, Fiona 1589 00:53:59,152 --> 00:54:02,239 With your fists of flailing fire 1590 00:54:03,531 --> 00:54:04,407 And then 1591 00:54:04,449 --> 00:54:09,246 Fucking Fiona 1592 00:54:10,956 --> 00:54:12,249 Guess what. 1593 00:54:12,290 --> 00:54:15,210 The cook rubbed his dick on all of your meals. 1594 00:54:15,252 --> 00:54:17,879 -Yeah, enjoy. - Fiona 1595 00:54:17,921 --> 00:54:21,424 'Cause now I'm fucking done 1596 00:54:48,994 --> 00:54:52,998 So fuck you, Fiona